Jail Time – 18 August 2014

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18 August 2014

“Good morning, Chuck. How was your weekend?”

“It was quiet. I came downtown to have a coffee with my friends, but nobody was there.  I held my cap out for a couple of hours. Made about ten bucks then went to the grocery store. I picked up a package of cabbage rolls, a piece of pie, then went home. After eating I lay in bed, pulled the covers over me and stayed there until about 4:30. I wasn’t sleeping. I just lay there with my eyes closed. After that I really felt refreshed.

“A while ago I saw this woman walking towards me on the sidewalk. I could see her for quite a distance. She was about twenty, wearing a tight black dress and gorgeous. When she got within about three feet of me, her cheap perfume overwhelmed me. I like a little perfume, but why do some women put on so much?

“Did you see that car cutting off the other one. That’s the way accidents happen. I remember one time my brother was driving my mother and I to the movie theater. It’s torn down now. We were getting near the theater, when a car cut in front of us and stopped. My brother ran into the back of him. It wasn’t his fault, but rear end collisions are always charged against the driver following behind. My dad was really pissed off. My mom told him, ‘It wasn’t his fault.’ Dad said, ‘I don’t give a damn whose fault it was. I’m the one who has to pay for the repairs.’ My brother got a beating for that. I’m surprised that my dad didn’t give me a beating for taking Mom to the movies. He could always manage to find a way to blame me for things.

“See that car stopped at the light? Do you see anything wrong?”

“No, I don’t notice anything wrong.”

“He’s over the line where he’s supposed to stop for the light. Even if he was right on the line it would be illegal. Same for pedestrians. If they’re between the cross walk lines and they have the walk light they have the right of way. If they’re outside, or right on the line, they don’t. I see people nearly getting killed every morning. Bicycle riders are the worst. They sail through red lights all the time. They think that the laws don’t apply to them.

“My lady friend has been in Cornwall for the past two weeks. She is supposed to be back today. I was hoping to go to lunch with her, but it doesn’t look like it’s going to happen.

“I guess I’ll go home. I have some bills to pay, but there’s one I’m not going to pay. It’s the one for $45.00, from the ambulance company.  I told them which hospital to take me to. Instead, they took me to another one. I’ll be damned if I’m going to pay for being taken somewhere I didn’t want to go. They can take me to court if they want to. I don’t mind. Even if the judge finds me guilty the court will have to pay my way home, maybe by wheelchair taxi. Rather than paying the fine I’d ask the judge, ‘How much jail time is that worth?’ It would cost them a hell of a lot more than $45.00 to keep me in jail. It costs around $100.00 just for processing.

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