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29 October 2014
“Well,” said Chuck, today’s going okay but yesterday was the day from Hell. It started out alright, but I decided to stop at one of those public walk in clinics. I went to the first one I thought of. When I got in the door I saw the price schedule on the wall. There was no way I could pay those prices. I remembered another one I used to go to — same thing there. The third one was okay. By okay, I mean that it was a public clinic. There was a line-up of people all the way around the room waiting to see the doctor. I waited my turn. What I thought was going to take a short time took me all day. I didn’t get home until six o’clock.
What I went there for was a red spot on my leg that had started hurting. It began with sore I got from falling in the boat. Each day the pain has gotten worse. Besides that the skin has become flaky and weeping. The doctor took a look at it, poked around a bit then prescribed antibiotics and some ointment to put on it. He he gave me some of those pads that women use to remove their makeup. I use adhesive tape to hold them in place. I’m supposed to take the pills every four hours. Of course, I can’t do that. I’m not going to set the alarm for 2 am, just to take a goddamned pill, so I miss that one. Apart from that, I’ve been doing everything the Doctor told me to do.
When I took the bandage off this morning, I got worried. The red spot has turned black. I don’t know that means, but what I’m afraid of is that it’s turned gangrenous because of some kind of flesh eating disease. I’m seeing my doctor this afternoon. My system couldn’t withstand any kind of operation. If it’s what I’m afraid of the only thing to do is to call all my family together, tell them what the situation is, tell them about my last requests: I want to be cremated; I don’t want any kind of service. I’ll then buy some cigarettes, go to a strip club have a drink, a smoke and a lap dance. If that doesn’t kill me the first time, I’ll do it again, until it does.