Archive for May 22, 2015




22 May 2015

“Good morning, Chuck. How is it going today?”

“Better than yesterday, except for that idiot Ghyslain, down the block. A guy came by and dropped me a twenty, then he dropped Ghyslain a twenty. He yells to me, ‘I got a twenty! I got a twenty!’ The stupid bastard. I wanted to punch his lights out. I didn’t get a single drop for about fifteen minutes.

“I did waste some money yesterday. I bought two scratch-and-win tickets at two dollars each. I didn’t win anything. I’m not one of those people who spends $60 a pay on scratch tickets.”

I asked, “Have you ever won with those tickets?”

“Yeah, $22 one time, $34 another, but mostly it’s $2, $5 or a free ticket. I don’t wan’t to will a million, but if I won $5000 you wouldn’t see me out here again.”

I said, “I saw the crazy lady with the sleeping bag down near Ghyslain.”

“Yeah, when I was talking to Metro she started screaming at me. It was all mumbo jumbo until she finished then she said, ‘So there!’ I hadn’t said a word. I didn’t know what to make of it. Then she clenched three of her fingers to make the shape of a gun and said, ‘Pow!!!’  Metro gets really scared when she does that to him. He said, ‘You never know what she has hidden, under that sleeping bag, over her arm.’ I don’t think she could get a real gun, but a knife would be easy.

“She was standing in front of the coffee shop door. A woman was leaving the shop and accidentally bumped her arm. The crazy lady slammed the door, the woman spilled her coffee and nearly fell on her ass.”

I said, “I remember that Shakes went into a bank, pretending he had a gun in his pocket and demanded cash.”

“No, what happened was, he and a bunch of friends were drinking. They thought it would be a good joke if someone walked into the bank with a paper bag and said there was a bomb in it. Shakes tried it. The staff knew him, phoned the cops and he served three years in prison. Then he was sent for another three years to a native alcohol rehabilitation center. He came out and said, ‘I’m not an alcoholic anymore. They cured me. Let’s have a drink to celebrate.’

“Once you’re an alcoholic you’re an alcoholic for life. I could probably take a beer or two, but if I did I’d want a cigarette. If I had to, I’d crawl on my hands and knees, to the store, to buy a pack. Then I’d be right back to where I was before.

“My wife never had any sympathy for alcoholics. I belonged to AA for a while. She said, ‘You don’t need any help to stop drinking.  It’s your choice, you fucked up, it doesn’t affect anybody else.’ Well, it does affect other people, especially family members, that’s why they have Al-Anon and Alateen. They’re to give strength and hope to friends and family of problem drinkers.

What is alcoholism?

Alcoholism is widely recognized as a disease of compulsive drinking, which can be arrested, but not cured. It is a progressive illness, which will get only worse as long as the person continues to drink. Total abstinence from drinking is the only way to arrest the disease. Alcoholism affects the entire family; indeed, everyone who has contact with the alcoholic is affected. Unfortunately, the only person who can stop the alcoholic from drinking is the alcoholic himself or herself. )

“Do you see those two women walking towards us. I like the one on the left, she has a smaller ass — as if I could do anything, even if I had the chance, but I’m not dead, I can still dream.”

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