Bear’s Birthday

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24 October 2012

This morning, as I approached Joy, she waved, got up and headed towards the library. When she returned she said, “I’ve been waiting for you. I had to pee so bad. I slept outside last night.”

“Why?” I asked.

“Chester’s drinking again. When he does, he gets all touchy feely. I’d had enough, so I packed my bag and slept behind the dumpsters, in back of Starbucks.”

“Do you have a sleeping bag?” I asked.

“No just this blanket, it was cold.” (35 degrees Fahrenheit)

“You have an appointment with your worker today, maybe she could get you a sleeping bag.”

“I’m just so fed up!” she cried, “My legs are aching. I’m half in the bag. There is a commercial on TV that says, ‘It’s now time for that second talk’ — referring to menopause. I need to have that second talk, but I have nobody to talk to. I remember my mother going through it. She was all over the place. I’m just losing it, man!”

“Perhaps you could talk to your worker about that. Also, Stella is coming down this morning.”

“I sure hope so.”

“She sent me an email. She wants to celebrate Bear’s fifteenth birthday. She has a card and a big bone for him.”

“I hope she bring the coat she promised me.”

“I saw Serge in the hospital last night. He was asleep the whole time I was there. He had a breathing tube in his throat and oxygen going in his nostrils. The nurse said they may take the breathing tube out either today or tomorrow, depending on how he responds. He had a slight fever so they had a cooling blanket, that looked like an air mattress, on top of him. That’s common with head injuries. He was lightly sedated and had been given Tylenol for pain. The nurse had been talking to him earlier and he said the pain wasn’t too bad. She said he’s had a long history of being admitted to hospital for falls. He sure looks younger with his head shaved.”

“They would have done that for the lice. When he was picked up last time, by Hope Recovery, they shaved off his beard. I’m glad it’s not more serious. I can’t take any more deaths right now.”

Andre stopped by and said to Joy, “I see Little Jake is at Silver’s old spot.”

Joy said, “Jake is family. I had to kick Al out of there this morning. Later I saw his girlfriend, Angeline. Her arm was in a make shift sling and was all purple. She said, ‘Bo did this to me.’ I said, ‘I hope you got him back.’ She said, ‘After he had punched me three times in the head, I stabbed him in the side. That slowed him down.’ Bo is going to be on a lot of shit lists. These guys got to learn not to treat women that way.”

I said to Andre, “How’s your day going so far?”

“Lousy, I’m barred from every McDonalds in town, the World Exchange liquor store, Hartman’s and Loblaws grocery stores. The list of places I can go is getting shorter and shorter.”

“What happened at McDonalds?” I asked.

“I was panning out front of the one on Bank Street. The district manager was there at the time — he barred me. He said, ‘I never want to see you in front of any of our stores. If I do, or if any of my staff does, the police will be called immediately.’ That was a good spot for me.

“I stole a cooked chicken, and some other meat, from Loblaws. I was hoping to have a real feast, So much for that idea.”

Joy started getting restless. She said, “I’ve had about enough of this place, and I’ve got to get my legs moving. I want to get drunk.”

…

I had agreed to meet Stella at the statue of the soldier, near where the group usually meets. Shakes, Gnome, Wolf and Shaggy, Outcast, Jacques, Loon, Stella, Weasel and Blackie the birthday dog were all there. Jake and Weasel were near coming to blows.

Shakes said, ‘Will you guys keep the noise down. Soon the cops will be coming.”

“Shut up, Shakes”, said Weasel.

“I won’t shut up. I’ll talk as much as I want to. Nobody’s going to stop me.”

I said, “I’m glad we got that settled, Shakes!” He laughed.

Loon was drunk, has no teeth, and was talking non stop over the din of the arguing.

Outcast asked me, “Do you understand a word he’s saying?”

“No,” I said.

Outcast said, “I’ve just come from Shark and Elaine’s place, I think Loon was there earlier. They were nodding off, so I left. Soon, Loon will be doing the same.

“Dennis, you coming at ten o’clock throws my whole schedule off. I think I should be having lunch now.”

“Sorry, Outcast, but I came to see Stella, not you.”

Joy said, “I’ve known some of these guys for twenty years. I’ve known Chester for a long time too. It really hurts, for him to treat me, and talk to me the way he does. Do you see the scar above Loon’s right eye? I gave that to him. One time he grabbed me by the crotch and I decked him. His forehead split open like a tomato. He’s never tried that again — the piece of shit. I’m really surprised that I haven’t got into a fight yet, today. There’s still time.”

Andre was sitting quietly. He said to me, “Sometimes it’s safer to not open your mouth.”

I asked Jacques, “Do you know if Serge has any family?”

“I don’t know. I’ve known him for a long time. He’s never mentioned any family to me.”

I said, “I wonder if his friend William knows about his family. Serge stayed with him for a while.”

“No, I ask him that. He said, ‘I think, maybe, he came from Vancouver or Toronto. I can’t remember which. I think he has a sister in Montreal.’ Vancouver, Toronto, Montreal — that’s a lot of people there, and Robert is a common name. William has been kicked out of his place. When Serge stayed there, a neighbor complained. He said that Serge was dealing drugs. Can you imagine, Serge dealing drugs? I’ve never even seen him smoke a joint. He just sits quietly. I like that. I talked to Serge about maybe sharing a two bedroom apartment, but now he’s nearly dead. I also thought about sharing a place with William, but he was given notice, the first night he was at his new place, that he was making too much noise. If you’re given notice three times, you’re out. That’s what happened. I don’t want to be in the middle of a situation like that, not me. I’ll just get me a bachelor apartment, it doesn’t matter how small, just someplace quiet. That’s what I want.

“Yesterday I found a tent in the garbage. It looks brand new. I set it up in my living room. I’ve never seen a tent so small. It would only fit one person. There is no way that two people could get in there. If I don’t find a place by the end of the month, maybe I’ll be sleeping outside. I don’t think for too long. Who knows?”

Jake sat next to me. He said, “I’ve blown my three hundred and fifty dollar start-up allowance. Now, they’re asking for receipts. DOES ANYBODY HAVE ANY RECEIPTS? I NEED SOME RECEIPTS.”

Joy asked, “Did you punch Weasel?”

“No, but I spit on him.

“I went to my HIV doctor and he wouldn’t give me my needles.”

I asked, “Why?”

“I don’t know.”

Two Outreach Workers with the Salvation Army came to talk to Shakes. “How are you coming along with my housing arrangements?” he asked.

“Were looking at a few places, the problem is they become available December first, so we’ll have to find someplace temporary for you, from the first to the end of November. Don’t worry, we’re working on it.”

Weasel and Stella were getting ready to leave. Stella showed me the card she had made. It had pictures of Bear as a pup, with his original owner Henri.

Joy said, “I remember when Henri first got Bear. There were two puppies in the back seat of a car. Henri was to choose which one he wanted. Bear jumped out the door and came straight to him. The other dog just sat there. That decided it. They were together until he died.”

Bear wandered over to me. I held my hand out — he bit it.

…

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Serge in Hospital

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23 October 2012

This morning, Andre was standing beside Joy’s spot. I said to him, “Don’t tell me, Joy had to pee.”

“You got it.”

“How’s your morning going, so far, Andre?”

“Lousy — twice, while I was panning, the cops pulled up and told me to move along.”

“How about trying someplace near Shakes’ ‘office’?”

“That’s where I was.”

“How about Silver’s old spot?”

“Little Jake’s there.” Joy returned. “I guess I should move along, let Joy get to work.”

After he left Joy said, That’s the third time he’s been by here. I finally had to tell him that he was interfering with my business.”

I asked, “Did he tell you when he’ll be going to court?”

“No, he didn’t show me the paper. He has two charges against him. One for the bottle of sherry, and one for $300.00 worth of meat from Loblaw’s. They found it in his backpack. He could hardly carry it.

“Have you heard about Serge?”

“No, I haven’t seen him lately.”

“He fell and hit the back of his head. I told him that he should go to the hospital to get it checked, but these guys are stubborn. The same with Silver, he had a swollen leg — instead of going to a hospital he went to the Shepherds, now he’s dead. Anyway, Serge had another fall. This time he hit his forehead. One side of his face is all bruised. He’s in Intensive Care at the Civic Hospital.”

“Are you sure it wasn’t a beating?”

“That was my first thought, but the medical staff at the hospital say that blood from his forehead is pooling in his cheek. The only thing keeping him alive is life support. They don’t know how to contact his family. There are so many Serge Roberts in the phone book.”

Chester came by but didn’t stay long. He saw a bag of mini chocolate bars that somebody had dropped for Joy. “Are those for me?” he asked. Joy just scowled. He left to talk to Jake, in Silver’s old spot.

“That asshole, yesterday I came home to find that he had invited Sylvain and Yves over. They had eaten all the soup. I had half a roast beef sandwich, from Tim Horton’s, that I put in the fridge. Albert asked, ‘Is that my supper?’ I said, ‘No, dude, you get your own. I’m tired of buying all the groceries for everyone else to eat.’

“Last week, I bought a dozen eggs, I got two. Of the pot of soup I made, I got one bowl. I stashed some bologna, Chester found it and ate that too. I said to him, ‘Chester, I haven’t eaten for days. Do you think of me at all?’

“I’m feeling so frustrated, and with Chester coughing all night I’m not getting any sleep.”

I said, “You have an appointment with your worker tomorrow. Do you think anything will come of that?”

“Yesterday, she was supposed to meet with Andre at ten o’clock. She didn’t show. I’m going to ask for a new worker. Janice is teaching this new girl. I thought they’d know what to do before they hire them. The time she’s taking for training is the time she’s not working on finding me a place.

“Pat and Chantal are the ones who found places for Hippo and Jake. I don’t like Pat, but if he can find me an apartment that’s all that matters. Otherwise, I’m thinking of asking them for a sleeping bag and go back to staying behind Starbucks. I’d leave my stuff at Chester’s.

“Sometimes, I just don’t want to be here.”

“Do you mean panhandling?”

“I used to be able to take a break when I got my check, but now I can’t. I just don’t want to be on this earth.”

…

I phoned the Civic Hospital to inquire about Serge’s condition. Telling them that I was his brother, I was able to speak to the nurse in the Intensive Care Unit. She said, ‘He was doing okay, but he kept losing consciousness, so we brought him into ICU to keep an eye on him. He has a breathing tube now. He’s suffered a cerebral hemorrhage — bruising and bleeding to the brain. We’re hoping to take the breathing tube out tomorrow, see how he is then. We’ll just take it one day at a time.’

…

At noon I joined a half dozen of my friends sitting on the curb were a half dozen of my friends. Shortly after, Andre rode up on his bicycle with a large bottle of water for Joy. Luther, by all accounts, has been alive, sober and staying with his girlfriend.

He said, “Dennis, I told you I’d get my guitar back, and here it is. I had an electric, but I sold it.

“Do you know what happened to my baby? They chopped her up. I saw the body. It was her sixteenth birthday party. They got out of control with booze and drugs. That’s why I drink. How do I forget about something like that?

“I’m also evil, especially when I drink, that’s what my girlfriend says. The doctors say I have psychotic tendencies.”

I said, “Don’t worry, Luther, that can be treated. I know you’re a good man.”

“I’m not Ojibwa,” he said, “I’m Dene. Do you know many Dene people?”

“Some,” I said.

“Do you know them to be honorable people?”

“Very honorable.”

“Would you give me money to buy a beer?”

“I don’t carry cash, but I can give you a card for a sandwich.”

“Okay,” he said. I handed him the card.

“Actually, I have another of these. I could sell them for $2.50 each, enough for a bottle.”

“It’s your choice, Luther.”

“No, I’ll give it back to you. Give it to someone who is hungry.”

“What was that all about,?” asked Joy.

Luther said, “I don’t mind accepting money, but I don’t want to be told what to spend it on.”

I asked Joy, “How have things been since this morning?”

“Okay, I’m not too happy about Luther and Gnome being here.”

Andre said, “It wouldn’t take much for me to ask them to leave.”

“I don’t mind asking him to leave, don’t worry.”

Luther said, “Ugly Rambo sitting with the pretty Indian woman.”

“Luther,” said Joy, “I don’t appreciate you making remarks about my friend, Dennis!”

“Joy,” said Emile, “he’s referring to my uncle. They used to call him Rambo. He was going out with Luther’s sister. It’s a long story.”

“Well,” said Joy, “I don’t want to hear it.”

Andre asked Joy, “Can I bum a cigarette?”

“Okay, this time, but that’s it. I appreciate you getting the bottle of water for me and doing a liquor run before that, but you’re becoming too much of a burden to carry. That goes for all these guys.”

Andre said, “I understand, Joy.”

…

Later in the day, I phoned Center507, the outreach program that had taken Serge to the hospital. The outreach workers had already left for the day, but I left my phone number in case I could be of any help in finding Serge’s family. I hope to visit him in the hospital, but they may have visiting restricted to immediate family only.

…

Serge is now in the Intensive Care Unit of the Civic Hospital, bed 29. He’s had a cerebral hemorrhage. Because he kept losing consciousness he now has a breathing tube. They expect to remove the breathing tube tomorrow or the next day. They don’t have plans for any surgery. He has been admitted previously for falls.

I visited him tonight, but he was asleep the whole time. He is under light sedation and is being administered Tylenol for pain. His head has been shaved, he has a bruise on his forehead and his right eye is black, apart from that he appeared to be resting comfortably. I was surprised that they had his age listed as 55.

The hospital was having trouble contacting his family. There are so many families with the surname Roberts in the phone book that it would be difficult to contact them all.

…

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Fuck Puppet

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22 October 2012

When I arrived at Joy’s spot this morning, she said, “Man, am I glad to see you. Have a seat on my cushion, it’s warm. I’ll be back in a few minutes.”

When she got back I asked her, “How was your weekend?”

“It was quiet. I don’t know what was going on with my stomach, but I couldn’t keep anything down. I made some really good soup in my crock pot. We had leftover chicken, I added veggies, rice and noodles, but I couldn’t even keep that down. Most of the weekend I slept or watched TV from my bed.”

“How has Chester been?” I asked.

“He was okay Saturday until he went to the Mission for his supper. When he came home he started coughing. I said to him, ‘Chester, now is the time to cut back on the cigarettes for a while.’ He chain smokes, one right after another. When he coughs he makes a really loud noise, like a dog barking, so I didn’t get much sleep last night.

“This morning, he got up just after I did. First thing, he had a cigarette, then the coughing started again. I said to him, ‘Have some chicken soup and rest for the day.’ He said he would. He may come down and visit with the boys for a while.”

“Did anything happen after I left Friday,” I asked.

“Not much, I got into it with red-haired Debbie.”

“It was funny — some of the government ladies, who come out for a smoke, saw us. They were talking to me today. They asked, ‘What was going on between you and that woman? We thought you were going to kill her. It was hilarious.’ I said, ‘I’m glad I was able to provide you some entertainment. I wouldn’t have killed her, but I would have come close.’ They asked, ‘What did you have against her?’ I said, ‘Do you mean besides the fact that she’s a fuck puppet for all the guys, and has a big mouth?’ They asked, ‘What do you mean by that?’ I said, ‘She’s slept with Chester, Andre, Little Jake –I don’t know about Jacques — anyone else that’s been around. She has AIDS and doesn’t use condoms. Little Jake had HIV, but he must have full-blown AIDS by now.’

“I said to the ladies, ‘You should see me with the guys. I don’t take shit from anybody. If someone gets smart with me they’ll get either a punch or a kick in the head. I can take care of myself, believe me.’ They said they thought I could.”

“By the way, Andre may be in jail now. Chester saw him coming out of the liquor store. As soon as he cracked his bottle, two security guards grabbed him. I’ve told him before, ‘If you boost a seven dollar and forty-five cent bottle of sherry and lose your freedom, is that a good trade?’ ”

I said, “He told me he never boosted from liquor stores, well, only once.”

“It was more than once, believe me.”

…

At noon the sidewalk curbs were crowded with half a dozen friends on either side. Joy made room for me and Jacques gave me a copy of the Metro to sit on. Joy was talking to the group, “I was told by a lady cop that, in their opinion, one of Ottawa’s finest is a serial killer, responsible for the murders of prostitutes over the last ten years. It would make sense — a person with power and authority, armed.”

“How about the cop that beat you up, Joy?” asked Andre.

“I didn’t report it. I went through that in Toronto, I didn’t want to go through it again.”

I asked, “What happened with Andre?”

“He was charged. He’ll have to appear in court.

“I grew up with this guy. His name was Luke. He was a handsome guy, but he became a tranny — called himself Lucy. He made a gorgeous woman, but a guy can never hide his Adam’s apple. He was out with a guy who thought he was a chick. When the guy found out, he killed him.

“I knew a lot of transvestites in Toronto. They were really nice to me — invited me to all their parties. I was a fat chick, but I was cute. The apartment they lived in was beautiful, draped fabric in the living room, like a tent. It was really over the top, but nice. Someone handed me a pellet-shaped lump of hash. I said, ‘What do I do with this?’ The guy said, go into the bathroom and take it like a suppository, up your ass. It will give you a body high as opposed to a head high.’ I went into the bathroom, but I put the hash in my purse. I didn’t want to be any more fucked up than I was. When I came out of the bathroom the guy asked me, ‘How does it feel?’ I said, ‘It feels a little uncomfortable.’ He said, ‘You must be a virgin.’ People kept handing me this stuff. They were stoned, but I put it all in my purse. By the end of the evening, I had a half ounce of hash. I didn’t need to hook at all.”

Weasel said, “Do you remember that cop we called Sasquatch? I met this woman at the Mission, we started getting it on, then she invited me over to her apartment. A while later we heard a loud knock on the door. I’m standing in my underwear. She opens the door and it’s Sasquatch, all seven-foot two of him. The woman was his former girlfriend. When he got through with me, even my socks were soaked with blood. Has anyone seen him around?”

Andre said, “He’s in Cornwall. He’s my uncle. I can remember we were at a party one time. He leaned on the apartment door — the whole thing came down and went through the door opposite. He was standing there looking sheepish. The people from across the way were dumbfounded. He said, “I guess I shouldn’t lean on doors anymore.”

Joy yelled across the sidewalk to Glenda, “What are you drinking?”

“Wiser’s, Devil’s Cut.”

Joy said, “Would you mind keeping it under your sweater, or in your bag. The cops come here regularly. I wouldn’t want to see you get a ticket and have to pour out your whiskey.”

To me, she said, “Look at Shakes, he’s laying in the middle of the sidewalk. This crowd is just asking for trouble. In a few minutes, I’m moving down about twenty feet to where the benches used to be.

“Glenda, Debbie and Gnome drank all Shakes’ sherry, smoked all his cigarettes and all his pot. Now that they have whiskey, do you think they’re going to share with him? No way! Glenda asked me where the liquor store was. I told her, ‘Go straight down Albert, two blocks to Metcalfe. You’ll see the World Exchange on your right. Go inside, it’s the first store on the left. You can’t miss it.’ She asked, ‘Will you come with me?’ I said, ‘No, for one thing, I’m barred, for another, I have everything I need, besides that,  I don’t know you.’ With her size, she’d be slow getting up. I should be able to get a few shots in, but if she caught hold of me I’d be in trouble. What do you think?

“Actually when I look around, there aren’t too many people here I would trust. Jake may remember something, sometime, and just blurt it out. Hippo is too soft. Andre and Jacques, I don’t know. Shakes, I’d trust him with my life, in fact, I have. He stood up to Big Jake to protect me until I told him to just stay down. There was no point in both of us taking a beating. Nobody could take on Jake.”

To Chester Joy said, “When you leave, I’m going to give you my cigarettes to take home. Andre’s been bumming off me all day, so has Shakes.”

…

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Why don’t you just kill him?

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18 October 2012

At noon I walked to the park. The weather was a balmy sixty-five degrees Fahrenheit. Sitting on the curb were five of my friends and Shaggy. Chester and Eric walked by, but didn’t stop.

Joy approached to greet me, “Dennis,” she said, “we were so worried that something had happened to you. I didn’t see you this morning and now it’s 1:10, we always expect you at noon.”

I looked at my watch, “Joy, it’s 12:10, this is the time I usually arrive. I was running late this morning because it’s garbage day. I came by your spot at about 8:50, but you weren’t there.”

“We must have just missed each other. I was probably in Tim Horton’s, I had to pee.”

Outcast said, “All of us thought it was one o’clock. Yesterday, you came by early to see Nancy, but she didn’t come. Today, she came by, but you missed her, you arrived late.”

I wore a sweater, but after sitting in the sun for a while, I took it off. With the sun shining on the back of my black shirt I felt so hot I moved to the shade.

Joy said, “I didn’t like the way that Weasel was snapping his fingers at Stella. It’s his dog, if she wants to come over to see Bear, she will. That Weasel is such an asshole.”

Jacques said, “Stella has always been nice. She’s been coming around for a long time, fifteen years maybe.”

“Crash was around then,” said Joy. “A lot of people have come and gone. Jacques, it’s only you, me, Shark and Elaine who are the originals.”

Somebody asked, “Where’s Shakes?”

Joy said, “He’s gone to his ‘office’.”

There were three bees flying around Jacques. He said, “What do you want from me? Is it my beer you’re after? I may be stupid but not as stupid as that.” As he was swatting at the bees he knocked his beer over with his knee.

“This morning,” said Jacques “the cops came by. They ask me to pour out my beer. I tip it upside down and say, ‘It’s empty. I just save the can for recycling.’ They didn’t even check my traveling mug. It was full of beer.”

Outcast said, “I’d just opened a fresh beer, I took one swig. The cop said, ‘Take one swallow and pour the rest out.’ He still gave me a ticket.”

Joy said, “Rodent was by earlier. What a piece of work he is.”

Outcast said, “I don’t like him either.”

Jacques said, “You guys, nobody likes him, so why don’t you just kill him?”

I said to Jacques, “That’s a straight-forward, simple solution. Why didn’t anybody else think of that?”

Joy said, “That asshole, Chester, really gave me a hard time yesterday. He was drunk. He always gets abusive when he’s had too much to drink. I phoned him this morning and asked him, ‘Is everything alright with us? You were so angry last night.’ He said, ‘Everything’s fine,’ but he just walked by and waved. He said he’s going to pay ten percent on the hydro bill, so they don’t turn the power off. I gave him money for hydro, he spent it all on beer. He’s going to Rodent’s place now. Usually, when he goes out, he leaves me the electronic key so I can get into the building, but this time he didn’t. I have my own key for the inside door.”

I said, “Couldn’t Chester have a copy made for you?”

“He could, but I don’t even want to go there. I should be able to get in. I’ll just have to wait until someone unlocks the door; I’ll slide in behind them. I hate doing that. I feel like a thief.

“Next week I go to see my worker, it’s about getting my identification.

I said to her, “Jake, Andre and Hippo all needed their identification replaced. They only had to wait a few weeks. Why is it that I’ve been waiting since January?’ She couldn’t give me an answer. She said that she’d look into it.

…

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Teeth Returned

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17 October 2012

This morning, as I approached Joy, she was doing a jig and smiling with her teeth clenched.

I said, “Don’t tell me, Joy. You have to pee.”

“Like ninety,” she said. “I’ll be right back.”

When she came back she said, “This morning, when I got to Tim Horton’s, I had to get them to unlock the security washroom, because the ladies was being serviced. I told the woman, ‘Either you unlock that door now, or I’m busting into the men’s room. I really have to go.’ ”

“How are your kidneys now?”

“Good, obviously, although, sometimes in the night, I have to get up and only a dribble comes out. That worries me.

“Chester was saying that he thinks he has Alzheimer’s. His memory is really bad. He fell backward, down fourteen concrete steps. He was with Outcast and Jacques. One minute he was there, the next minute he was gone. He was in a coma for five days. That was two years ago. Sometimes, he thinks that he just recently got out of the hospital.

“He was mad at me yesterday. I guess he expected that I would join him at the Shepherds for lunch. I don’t go into those places. People often ask me about that. There are too many people and a lot of them I just don’t care to see. There are a lot of crack heads. You never know what they’re going to do.

“Even at Thanksgiving, I didn’t go for the meal. For one thing, I don’t like turkey; for another, I don’t like crowds. I barbecued some ribs, roasted veggies and baked potato. It was the best Thanksgiving meal I’ve ever had.

“Last year, Meg was working with the church ladies. She brought me a frozen turkey for the Christmas season. In fact, she brought something different for each of the twelve days of Christmas. She isn’t there anymore. I don’t know what the church ladies will do this year.

“Chester should be by soon. I want to use his phone to cancel my appointment with the lady from E. Fry (The Elizabeth Fry Society). My legs are so sore, I just can’t take that much walking today. She’s good that way. I’ve already had five appointments, probably more time than I would have had if I’d gone through the group anger management program.

“Which reminds me. I got a letter in the mail from Big Jake yesterday. That really freaked me out. He wasn’t supposed to know my address. I phoned Rodent, sure enough, it was him that gave it to Jake. I said to him, ‘I’ve told you before that I don’t want Jake knowing where I am.’ He said, ‘But Joy, Jake wanted to write to you and didn’t know where to send the letter. If you write him back, I can tell you the prison code the inmates use if you want him to phone you.’ I said, Rodent, I don’t want a letter, I don’t want a phone call. I don’t want anything to do with Jake.

“Half the things Rodent said to me were in prison code. He said Jake was teaching some kind of course to get points. He hasn’t been on a detox program. I didn’t know what he was talking about, or when Jake will be getting out. He hasn’t been in penitentiary long enough to know all that stuff. One time he said he’d served twenty-five years; another time he said it was twelve. He said when Jake gets out, he’s going to be staying at his place. I wish them well with that. It sounds a little too cozy for me.

“I’ve served more time than most of the guys put together. I served three out of five for something I didn’t even do. I just happened to be in the car.

“Here’s Chester now. Chester, can I use your phone? This looks really great doesn’t it? A panhandler using a cell phone.”

I said, “A friend of mine mentioned that to me yesterday. He said he saw a panhandler at the corner of Bronson and Catherine talking on a cell phone. He said he wouldn’t give money to the guy, and any he’d given to him, he wanted back.”

…

I went to the park at ten o’clock. Wednesday, it’s the day that Stella usually comes for a visit. Everyone was hoping she would come.

Outcast said, “Dennis, what are you doing here this time of day? Are you playing hooky from work?”

“Yeah,” I said, “I’m confusing everyone. I was hoping to see Stella,”

Joy said, “She has a coat for me.”

“She hasn’t been here yet,’ said Outcast, “maybe tomorrow; but they’re forecasting rain for tomorrow, so maybe not. I haven’t been here because I’ve been sick. I’m on a massive dose of antibiotics. Nearly everyone in my building is coughing and sick.”

“Do you have pneumonia again?” I asked.

“Not pneumonia, emphysema. My lungs are full of infection.”

Shark handed Outcast a sealed clear plastic bag.

“Thanks, Shark!” said Outcast. He held up the bag and said, “My teeth! I was wondering whose house I had left these in. When I drink beer from cans I like to take my teeth out. Usually, I put them in my shirt pocket, sometimes they fall out. I lost my original teeth playing hockey.”

Joy said, “It freaked me out the first time I woke up to find a set of teeth, on the bedside table, looking back at me.”

Jacques handed me a copy of the Metro newspaper to sit on.

“Don’t you need this, Jacques?”

Joy said, “Jacques always has lots. He needs two copies for his fat ass.”

“That’s right,” said Jacques,” I need two copies for my fat ass.

“I heard that they are changing O.D.S.P. (Ontario Disability Support Program) to separate the sick people from the addicts and alcoholics.”

Outcast said, “I qualify on both counts.”

Jacques asked, “What’s going to happen when we get a new Premier of the province, now that Dalton McGinty has resigned?”

“He’s the one who signs our checks. The next guy might cut us off completely.”

“Jacques, are you moving to Vanier?”

“No, that fell through. It was $850. a month. I can’t afford that. I called Shark’s landlord, he has buildings all over the city. He’s going to try to find me a place. I’m not sure if I believe him too much. He said he’ll have something for me on twenty-two. I’ll see. I’ve got ’till the end of the month. Otherwise, I sleep on the street, or at the Shepherds.”

Outcast said, “You’re not going to find much for under $850.”

Joy said to me in a whisper, “All of these guys have had apartments before, but they were kicked out. I’m pissed off that Jake got a place before I did. Even Weasel has a nice apartment on Somerset. The last place he was in they condemned, it was that nasty.”

…

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Bed Bugs Again

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16 October 2012

This morning, as I approached Joy, I could see that she was shivering, even though she had her blanket wrapped around her legs.

“Hi, Joy,” I said, “don’t you have any warm, winter clothing?”

“I’m wearing two pairs of long underwear under my jeans. This coat is warm, it’s just sitting on the concrete that’s making me cold. Chester is going to give me his winter pants. He doesn’t want them anymore. I said, ‘If you’re going to throw them out, I’ll take them.'”

“I asked, “Did your worker come by yesterday?”

“No,” she said, “she’ll come today or I’ll see her for my regular appointment tomorrow.

“Yesterday I hung out with Andre, Little Jake and Shakes. I went at Andre, he just won’t get the message. I said to him, We’ve been through this before. I don’t want you touching me. ‘But, Joy,’ he said, ‘I’m clean now!’ I said, ‘Andre, you’ve got five days dirt under your fingernails. Don’t tell me you’re clean. Even if you were, I haven’t been with a man for the past year. I don’t intend to start with you.’ Still he kept putting his hand on my thigh, as if it were some kind of joke. Even Shakes and Jake yelled at him, ‘Andre, for Christ’s sake, leave her alone, she’s family!’ Again he put his hand on my thigh and started moving it up, so I punched him in the side of the head. I said, ‘Next time, I’ll stand up and kick you in the head.’ Can you believe it, he started crying. His eyes welled up and he said, ‘Joy, I love you. We’d be good together.’ I said, ‘No, I don’t think so.’ I just want to be left alone.

“This morning, when I was in the bathroom, I saw a red spot on the wall. I thought to myself, That spot shouldn’t be there. I took a piece of toilet paper, wiped the spot, sniffed it — sure enough, it was a baby bed bug. Next time the guy comes to spray, I’m going to be there. I’ll make sure he souses the carpet, the baseboards, anywhere else they like to hide.

“It was just getting to the point where I was sleeping through the night. Now, I have to worry again, about whether or not the sheets and covers on my air mattress are touching the carpet. Besides that, I think that the tube-shaped air chambers are affecting my fibromyalgia.”

…

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Street Sister

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.

15 October 2012

‘Street sister’ Stella helps those less fortunate

by Gerry Sutherland of the Ottawa Citizen

 

This is a true story about someone I know who wants to do something to help those that are not in the mainstream of our society. Her name is Stella and she lives across the street from me. People in our comfortable adult community know her as the one who does so much work attending to the flower beds in the common property. But, on Wednesdays, and sometimes on other days, Stella disappears from our street and goes to her other life in downtown Ottawa.

Go to the corner of Kent and Queen around 8 a.m. and there’s a good chance you’ll see Stella. She’s sitting with a panhandler on the side of the street, dressed in a T-shirt and jeans. Stella is now in her other life as friend to the drunks, drug addicts, and ex-cons that are panhandling as they sit in the doorways and the sides of streets. Not only does she talk to these friends, but she brings them clothes and other necessities to make their lives a little more comfortable, especially during the cold winter months. And sometimes her husband, Tim, is there too, doing his part.

Stella is trusted and loved by these street people. She arrives in the morning on a bus from her home. Driving her car there is not appropriate because buses are, what the street people use and she wants to act like an equal rather than someone from ‘the right side of the tracks.’ Living in a foster home and then adopted by a well-to-do family in Winnipeg in the late 1950s was Stella’s early life. In her youth she liked animals. Later on in adult life she became interested in the lives of street people. This interest has lasted for over 15 years. When asked how long she intends to do this work she answers with a twinge of sadness, “I will continue until I can no longer physically manage.” Stella has multiple sclerosis.

His name was Angelo and he was a typical panhandler. He got stabbed by another panhandler and as a result of blood loss suffered permanent brain damage. Angelo now lives in supervised lodging and Stella, often accompanied by husband Tim, goes to see him every week. This caring action demonstrates the love this lady has for her fellow humans, regardless of what station in life they might occupy. She knows that street people, in spite of their excess drinking, their addiction to drugs, or their past crimes have a basic need that we all have. They want someone who will treat them as equals, some who they can talk to, and especially someone who cares for them. Stella meets those criteria. As she sits and walks with her ‘extended family’ she is comfortable in presenting herself to them as an equal and friend. That’s what they need and that’s what they get from this grand lady. I don’t suppose Stella will ever be officially recognized for her good work. In our society a person who is a friend of those that live on the streets is not usually a candidate for recognition. But that doesn’t really matter to her. Instead, she is content to be accepted and trusted by her street friends. Stella knows there is respect and love inherent in the expression used when they call her their ‘street sister.’

…

It had rained during the night. Sidewalks were wet. Joy was protected by a plastic cushion. I sat on the cold, damp concrete. “How was your weekend, Joy?”

“It was quiet. I went out Saturday night and hung out with Little Jake and Andre. When I got home I got a frantic phone call from Toothless Chuck, ‘V’s dead, He was hit by a car.’ I’m not sure how the accident happened but Chuck has broken bones in his foot and refuses to go to the hospital.

“This may sound unkind, but V’s better off dead. Chuck didn’t train him properly and would kick him if he misbehaved. That’s no way to treat a dog.”

I asked, “Do you have any appointments coming up to obtain your identification?”

“My regular appointment is Wednesday, I’m so frustrated that I’ve started cutting myself again. I was so proud that I had gone almost a year without doing that. I need my medication. They say the most common reasons for cutting is Attention or Depression. My reason is definitely Depression. Chester makes it worse with all his noises. He had the temperature way up yesterday, to the point I was sweating, but do you think he would put it up this morning when I said that I was cold? No!”

Mental Health Issues: People suffering from mental illnesses such as bipolar disorder, chronic depression, eating disorder tend to hurt themselves in some or the other way. When they reach the highest level of sorrow, they stop feeling anything. This lack of emotions sometimes makes them suffer even from panic attacks, so they cut themselves. When they see their blood, and experience the pain they feel relieved as they are assured that they are still capable of having some feeling. However, this is not the case with everyone suffering from mental illnesses, this is more commonly seen in people who suffered from childhood trauma or abuse. I said,

“I was thinking back to this time last year. You were so happy. You’d received all your identification and your health card. You had moved into that nice house with Chuck. You had your pet snake, the lizards and Chuck’s dog, but you were stressed about the cop car parked in front of your house. That was before your kidneys failed.”

“Yeah, no chance of that now. Mind you, we had three cop cars in front of the apartment building yesterday. Chester said, ‘Are they here for you, Joy?’ I said, ‘No, Chester, they’re here for you.’ He said, ‘Me, I don’t do any bad stuff.’ I said, ‘I don’t either.’ They were probably called because of the crack heads down the hall.”

I said, “Even a place like Hippo’s would be better for you. He has to deal with crack heads, but he has his privacy, he has cable, the choice to watch any programs he wants, and in English too.”

“Yeah, my worker is coming to see me and Andre, at noon, about two apartments she’s found. I sure hope that works out. I’m overdue for some good news.”

“I asked, “Did you get your laundry done?”

“Yeah, most of it. I washed all Chester’s winter clothes. There wasn’t enough room for mine. Chester’s going to give me his winter pants. They go with this parka. Hopefully, I won’t get too cold this winter. My arthritis and fibromyalgia just won’t take the cold.”

“Chester isn’t in the cold that much, is he? He doesn’t pan.”

“No, he just comes to the Mission for meals and visits with the guys for a while. If he’s cold, he goes home.”

…

At noon the temperature was a balmy 63 degrees Fahrenheit. I felt too warm in my down-filled winter coat, so I sat on it instead. Shaggy greeted me at the sidewalk — licking my hand and barking.

“She’s okay,” said Wolf, “Go ahead and pet her. That’s what she wants.”

Eight of my friends were sitting on the curb.  I was sitting on the sidewalk facing Joy. Marilyn was fidgeting, standing beside me. At one point she draped her coat over my shoulder, while she rooted through her purse looking for change to buy a cigarette.

I said, “Hey, what am I — a coat rack?”

Joy said, “I wish that dog would shut up for a while.”

I asked, “How did the rest of your morning go? Did your worker come by to show you the apartment?”

“Today is a typical Monday, although it is payday for the government. My worker should have been here hours ago, but I know that on Friday she had a lot of shit on her plate. She’ll come either later today or tomorrow.”

“Have you heard any more from Chuck, about his broken foot?”

“No, I didn’t go over. When I talked to him on the phone he said something about community service. He’s not going to be able to do much with a broken foot.”

Jake asked, “Is Chuck still living in the same place?”

Joy said, “No, he has a really nice apartment on Stewart Street. I’m sure he won’t have it for long. He has too many people living there. Every night there are twelve to fifteen people. They’re loud, drunk — the police get called there a lot.

“He says, ‘I can’t let people sleep on the street!’ I said to him, ‘Dude, yes you can! They aren’t your problem!’ It was the same when I lived with him. People would eat all our food, there was hardly any place to sleep. It was doing my head in. I had to get away from there.

Saturday he had a party with a lot of muk muks. Magdalene brought Ruby, a friend of hers. This Ruby chick got in my face as soon as she arrived. Within a few minutes, I was on my feet. Chuck had to hold me back. Somebody was holding Ruby back. I said, ‘Let her go. I can deal with her.”

“Today Chuck mentioned that Ruby had phoned and asked him to apologize to me. She said she was out of control. I said, ‘It’s all water under the bridge to me.’ The thing is, I’m sure she doesn’t remember what I look like, but I sure as hell remember her. The next time I see her, I’ll just walk up behind her and give her a snap at the back of the head. She won’t know what hit her.”

There was a demonstration taking place in the park. Andre said, “The R.C.M.P. (Royal Canadian Mounted Police) are there and some natives with a red flag, a yellow sunburst in the center, and the silhouette of an Indian brave on that.”

Joy said, “Andre, you’re part native, you don’t recognize the flag of the Mohawk Nation. There are a lot of them on Turtle Island or Victoria Island. Don’t you know about the land grant from Queen Victoria that gave the island in the Ottawa River and the land we’re sitting on, to the Seven Nations of the Iroquois Confederacy? That included the Mohawks of Akwesasne, Kahnawake, the Hurons of Wendake and the Anishinabegs.”

“Well, I’m sorry,” said Emile, “I must have been sick when they taught that history lesson.”

I noticed that Shakes was very quiet.

Joy said, “He didn’t get up until eight o’clock, he’s sober and he doesn’t have any pot. Usually by this time he’s been panning long enough to get a couple of bottles.”

I walked over to him, “How are you feeling Shakes?”

“I’m broke,” he said. I stayed at the Shep’s last night. Somebody stole, my bottle, my mary-jane and my money.”

“Make sure you eat, okay, Shakes,” I said.

“I will, thanks, brother.”

…

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Curly Water

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.

12 October 2012

The mornings are getting ever colder. Joy was wrapped up, rubbing her legs. André was sitting on a cushion.

He said, “This cushion keeps me dry, but it sure doesn’t keep me warm.”

Joy said, “I’m going to get one of those plastic storage boxes and stash it behind Starbucks when I don’t need it. This cold really causes my legs to ache.”

I asked, “What happened when the police came by, yesterday?”

“Nothing much — the usual. They sent the Hope Recovery van for Serge. He was sleeping at ‘the heater’. I didn’t like the way they were treating him. I said, ‘Hey, be careful with him. He’s my friend.’ One of them kept waving her hand in front of her face. I know he probably doesn’t smell that good, but they must have dealt with worse than him. I found it disrespectful.”

“How has Chester been?”

“He was better this morning. Mind you, I bought him a gram of pot yesterday. When I came home he said, ‘Joy, I saved you a joint.’ I said, ‘That’s okay, Chester, I have my own.”

“Do you have any plans for the weekend?”

“No, I’ll probably be doing laundry. Some clothes I had just thrown on top of the bags I moved out to the balcony. They’ll have to be washed and asshole probably has things he wants to have washed.”

I said, “I’ll have to be getting back to work now. Will you be at the park at noon?”

“We’ll probably be at the island, or under the bridge. We’re getting hassled too much at the park, especially if there are more than four of us.

…

It was snowing at noon. I passed Andre on my way to the park. He said, “Hi Dennis, I’ll be back in a few minutes. I just have to get something.”

I could hear Shaggy barking long before I could see anyone. It brought to mind a comment that Silver had made a while back, I don’t want to go up there, Shaggy’s barking his head off. On the curb on one side was Little Jake, on the other side was Hippo, Chester, Joy, Wolf and a friend of his (I can’t remember his name),

Hippo said, “My parents visited yesterday and brought some DVDs, but they took them home with them. My dad brought a tape measure last week, but he took it back yesterday. I don’t know what all that was about. I wish they’d left the DVDs — there were some good movies there. I have cable now. I just plugged it in and it’s working.”

Joy said, “He’s been complaining like this all morning.”

Hippo said, “I turned my tv on full volume this morning. It’ll serve the crack heads right for keeping me awake all night.”

Joy said, “Andre’s gone to get a bottle of water for me since he drank most of mine.”

Andre returned with Joy’s water, did a little dance then sat next to Jake. A woman was passing. He said, “Hey, beautiful, did you wash your hair with curly water today?”

Wolf said, “This is only my second time out this week. I was here on Tuesday. I haven’t got my clothing figured out yet, for this weather. I’m warm on top, but I need warmer shoes. Can you believe this snow? Shaggy doesn’t know what to make of it either.”

Chester went on a run for Joy. After he left she said, “I bought a dozen eggs last night, I had one. I checked this morning, there were only five left. Chester ate six eggs in one day and he goes to the Mission for meals. I also bought some bologna, but I stashed that away.

“This afternoon I’m going to Chuck’s old place to see if my checks are there. I’m expecting one from Trillium for a hundred bucks and one from G.S.T. (Goods and Services Tax) for sixty. I’ll check the mailbox, or if someone is at home, I can ask if any mail is there addressed to me. I’ll just tell them that I was slow in getting my change of address filed. I hope they don’t ask for Identification, because I don’t have any. Last time the crack head gave them to me.” 

…

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Back from the Garden

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.

11 October 2012

I could see my breath this morning. Joy was wrapped in her blanket sitting next to Andre. I shook hands with both of them and sat next to Joy.

I asked her, “How did your appointment go yesterday?”

“She was messing with my head. She said, ‘You’ve had quite a life, haven’t you?’ I said, ‘It started with my grandfather, then my father, then his younger brother. I got into drugs, was kicked out of my home, joined a biker gang, was into prostitution, jail, then ended up on the street, sleeping behind a dumpster. So, yeah, I’ve had quite a life.’ ”

“Is she any closer to getting you in to see a doctor, or at least get you back on your previous medication?”

“She’s working on it. I see her again next Wednesday. I’m just tired of this runaround. It’s been going on since January.”

I said to Andre, “I see you’ve shaved again.”

“I’m trying to look respectable for a while.” To Joy he said, “I guess I look better than I did last weekend. I still can’t figure out how I ended up in that garden. I sure didn’t get far from Little Jake’s place.”

Joy said, “The last time I saw you, you were sitting in the middle of somebody’s lawn. I told you to come, but you said, ‘I’m staying right here.’ ”

“I guess I can get pretty stubborn, sometimes.”

“Sometimes?” I asked. “When aren’t you stubborn?”

“That’s more like it,” said Joy.

“So, you left me there?”

Joy said, “I saw the 14 coming from one direction, so I figured the one going the other way would be along soon. I wasn’t going to miss my bus arguing with you. Yes, I left you there.”

Andre said, “All I know is, I woke up with watermelon and squash all over me. I had tomato dripping down my chin. I was a mess.”

I said, “You told me you remembered slicing a tomato with a Tim Horton’s card.”

“Yeah, I remember saying that.”

Joy said, “I remember one time, sitting here, a guy wearing a six hundred-dollar suit, and an even more expensive overcoat, threw a full cup of coffee at me. It burnt my face. I went after the guy with all I had. Some of my regular ladies came by and asked what happened. I said, “Look at me. This jerk threw a cup of coffee at me. They started hitting him with their purses.”

“Did anyone call the police?” I asked, “That’s assault! He shouldn’t get away with that!”

“Somebody may have called the police. I didn’t stick around. What I did to the guy probably would have gotten me charged. Can you imagine, someone going into a restaurant, buying a coffee with the express purpose of throwing it on somebody? He must be one sick fuck. It’s not as if I even ask for money. I just sit here. I say, ‘good morning’ to some people who I know, apart from that I’m quiet as a mouse.”

I asked Joy, “How are you and Chester getting along?”

“Last night we had another big argument. He slammed the door in my face. I said, ‘Chester, I’m moving out. I can’t put up with this bullshit any longer.” I packed my bag, put it out on the balcony. It must have weighed more than me. I didn’t have money for a cab. I had no place else to stay. I thought about going to the dumpsters behind Starbucks, but they’ve moved them close to the wall now. Nobody is staying there any more. I don’t know where Bearded Bruce is. I think he’s with Weasel.

“Chester said, ‘Please Joy, don’t leave. I love you.’ So I stayed the night. He was a little better this morning.”

Andre said, “Bruce is trained as a chef, isn’t he?”

“Bruce is a good cook, but he serves beans with everything. He filled my plate until it was heaping. I couldn’t finish half of it. Chuck took some, but he couldn’t finish his either.”

I said, “I was talking to Winston yesterday. He was mentioning the Native Friendship Center on Rideau. He was saying that every Wednesday there is a free meal, story telling, dancing and drumming. Do you know anything about that?”

Andre said, “I went there once. A guy said to me, ‘This is for native people.’ I’m part Ojibway. I said, “Who are you to say whether or not I’m part native. I see a guy over there that looks white, and another over there. Did they have to prove they were native?’ The guy says, ‘I know they’re native. You’re lucky you got a bowl of cereal. Don’t come back again.’ ”

Joy said, “I’ve had the same problem, my father was Ojibway, my mother was English. I’m metis, but I look white. I don’t fit in anywhere.”

…

At noon I was leaving the building, where I work, and ran into Buck, and his dog Dillinger. He said, “Joy, Andre and Shakes are together, sitting in the middle of the street.’ I had no idea what that meant. I found them sitting on the concrete island with elevated flower garden, that divides the Mackenzie King bridge, near Elgin.”

I said to them, “Hawk told me that you were in the middle of the street, I didn’t know what he meant.”

Joy said, “We’re just trying to stay out of trouble. The cops were by earlier. They can’t say anything about us sitting here. We’re not talking to anybody, we don’t have any alcohol visible.” Then she looked at Shakes.

“Shakes, for Christ’s sake, will you put that bottle under your coat or something. You don’t have to advertise that you’re drinking.” Just then a police car passed.

“Just watch, he’s going to turn around.” she said. The car continued on and didn’t return.

Andre said, “I haven’t seen that big cop, Caron, lately. The one with the muscles and all the tattoos.”

Joy said, “I heard that he got promoted. He works in the building now.”

“He sure doesn’t like Little Jake,” said Andre. “I remember the last time, Jake was sitting on the ground, Caron was bending over him saying, ‘Why don’t you learn to shut up. If you say one more word, I’m going to take you behind that electrical shed and beat the shit out of you.’

“The other cop looked at me and said, ‘If he gets into it with your friend, I’m not big enough to do anything about it. If you can talk reason to Jake, now would be a good time.’ I bent down and said to Jake, ‘This guy is the size of a tree. There’s no way out of this. Just keep your mouth shut.’ Jake said, ‘Okay.’

Joy started sneezing, over and over again. She said, “I heard that a sneeze is like one tenth of an orgasm. I usually sneeze ten times. I don’t need men at all.

“I’m not looking forward to going home. Chester is still acting pissy. He went to the Mission for lunch and was complaining about the food. He said, ‘They were serving grilled cheese sandwiches. I told them it was garbage and threw it in the trash.’ I’ve seen Chester cook grilled cheese sandwiches. He didn’t throw it in the trash; he ate it, and didn’t complain.”

“Is Chester still upset about Silver’s death?”

“I guess so, but he has to move on. I have.”

“I need to be on my medication and I’m having a real problem with menopause. I’ve got more zits now that I’ve had at any time in my life. I like my face. I don’t want to look like this. I’m whining, aren’t I?”

I said, “You have good reason to be upset.”

I had to return to work. I shook hands with Joy. Andre and Shakes then headed towards Elgin. A police car pulled up. The cop asked, “Are you guys waiting for your meal?” I’ll hear the rest of the details tomorrow.

 

…

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Downtown Charlie Brown

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10 October 2012

This morning was even colder than yesterday. I had a picture of Silver, from the funeral home. I gave it  to Metro. He would have seen him every morning for nearly eleven years. Joy was wrapped in her blanket, rubbing her legs.” I wore the wrong shoes today. These Pumas, given to me by Wolf, are worth about a hundred and fifty bucks. People look at me and they figure, Why are you panhandling if you can afford shoes like that? I try to hide them, but I have to straighten my legs out to rub them every once in a while. They’re really bad today.”

“How are you and Chester getting along?”

“He got really drunk last night. I gave him some money and asked him to buy a bottle for me. He used my money to buy himself more beer. He went through an eighteen pack yesterday. Usually, after six he’ll be asleep.

“He was saying to me, ‘Joy, I love you. I wont mind if you stay after Christmas. Then he touched my leg. He hasn’t done that for a while.”

“I said to him, ‘Chester, you don’t like to be touched. I feel the same way, so keep your hands to yourself.’

“Later, he was banging around in the kitchen stark naked. He said, ‘What’s for supper?’ I told him, ‘I’m having this box of Kraft Dinner. I don’t know what your having. When are you going to buy some groceries?’ I’ve really spent a lot this month supplying him with cigarettes — and he chain smokes, one right after another. I’ve bought all the food. He hasn’t bought any.

“Well, I don’t think I’m going to be making any more money this morning. I had a good day yesterday.”

“I’ll see you later, Joy. Stella will be bringing pumpkin tarts.”

“I’ll give mine to Albert. I can’t stand pumpkin. I don’t mind the seeds, but that’s all.”

…

Later, at 10:00, I went to the park. Stella and her husband Tim were there. Stella loves to walk Weasel’s dog, Bear. She’s known him since he was a pup — at that time he was owned by Andre, who has since passed away. Stella had brought pumpkin tarts, with whipped cream, for everybody. She also brought me a package of photos and a photo copy of a newspaper article entitled, ‘Street Sister.’

Joy said, “Janice, my worker, is meeting me here to take me to my Elizabeth Fry appointment.” She poured some wine in her water bottle, added water and placed it in her bag. Little Jake, said, “can you roll me a joint?”

Janice arrived and said hello to the people she knew. Andre asked, “We’re meeting tomorrow, right? You’re coming here?”

“That’s right Andre.”

Joy asked, “How many buses do we have to take, and how far do we have to walk?”

“We can just walk down to the next cross street and board an 85. That will take us right there.”

Joy asked, “Can you just wait until I finish this joint? Then I’ll be ready to go.”

“Sure, we have time.”

Joy hoisted her heavy backpack onto her shoulders and they walked down the sidewalk towards the bus stop.

I said hello to everybody I knew. Shakes introduced me to Clifford.

He said, “So, you’re Dennis the Menace! I’m Downtown Charlie Brown. I’ve been on the street for the past few days. Before that I was in a recovery program. I’m native Algonquin. I was born, on the Madawaska River, near Algonquin Park. I have a deep history. My grandfather was a guide for the Group of Seven, from 1920 to 1933, when they painted in the park. He served three terms as National Chief of the Assembly of First Nations. I’m also related to the President of the Odawa Native Friendship Center. My father is a millionaire, but he won’t even answer the phone to me. He wont give me fifty bucks; won’t even give the price for a bottle. My sister is the same, she has a great big house; I sleep on the street. She says, ‘You got yourself this way, you get yourself out.’ ”

I said, “I’m really interested in learning about native culture. Is the Odawa Center a good place to go?”

The best place is the Aboriginal Drop-In Center. Every Wednesday the native ladies host a meal, storytelling, chanting and drumming. You’ll get to see Shakes dance, sing and play guitar.”

“Shakes,” I said. “I didn’t know you sang and played guitar.”

Clifford said, “Shakes and I used to sing in the park, He taught me some boxcar Willie and other blues songs:

Boxcar’s my home, railroad my friend
It’s been that way since I don’t know when
I’m here today, tomorrow I’m gone
Where I hang my hat is where I call home

Stars at night my roof over head
The ground below where I make my bed
Horizons you see, well that is my walls
When the sun comes up my hobo blood calls.”

“I love Boxcar Willie, and all the old blues singers.” I said.

Clifford said, “When I think of native culture I get so angry. In school the nuns forced us to speak English. They called what we spoke, ‘the devil’s language’. If we were ever caught speaking Algonquin or any other native language we would be beaten with the edge of a ruler or a leather strap. Can you imagine if something like that happened today, especially to the children of white people. The nuns would be arrested.

“All this land we’re on was given to the Algonquin by treaty, even the land where the Parliament buildings stand. The government decided that it was a good military location, so they just took it. The Rideau canal was built mostly with native labor. They were paid starvation wages, most of them had families to feed, so they’d feed their families first. Many were worked to death. There isn’t even a plaque to commemorate the natives who died.

“Most native people would rather sleep outside, than in one of the shelters. Last night the guy in the bunk on my right kept saying, ‘six, six, six, six, six…’ all night long. He never stopped. The guy on my left was a crack head. Every twenty minutes he’d get up and walk around. I didn’t trust him, so I was trying to sleep with one eye open. Whenever he got up, or went back to bed I woke up.”

…

Sample my books for free — To date, $1945.00 has been donated to the homeless:
Gotta Find a Home: Conversations with Street People
http://buff.ly/1SGzGCY ($.99 Download)
http://buff.ly/1qLHptc ($.99 Download)
https://buff.ly/2lUfp6Q ($.99 Download)
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Podcasts:http://buff.ly/1Pxlf9p
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