Respect Your Elders

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#author……https://buff.ly/2xHgS3p 

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16 November 2012

This morning Metro handed me a newspaper and said, “Joy’s up there.”

“Thanks, Metro, have a good day.”

There was a large yellow garbage truck parked in front of Joy, who was talking with the driver. I walked up to him and said, “Hi, I’m Dennis. I always say hello to you, but I don’t know your name.”

“It’s Delmar, I don’t give my name out to too many people. It’s a habit from my past.”

Joy said, “That’s a nice name. I’m the same. When someone asks my name I ask, ‘What do you think it is?’

I said, “Or you say, ‘What name did I give last time?’ I generally don’t carry a wallet or identification. I just don’t trust people.”

Delmar said, “It’s time to get back to work.” I held out my hand to shake his. He said, “You probably don’t want to shake this hand, because of where it’s been.”

Joy and I sat down. I asked, “So, how was your night? Are you getting used to the place?”

“Now, that my workers have me in an apartment, it seems they want to forget about me. Hippo got a brand new bed from Sears when he moved in, so did Little Jake. I want a new futon, so I can fold it up during the day. My worker offered me a hundred-dollar gift certificate for their store. She said, ‘Maybe you can get a futon there.’ I don’t want someones used bed that they’ve cleaned up a bit. I’ve had enough trouble with bugs.

“I’ve never liked the Salvation Army. They’ve never helped me before, so I never donated money to them, or the Mission either.

“They fixed my bathroom sink. They checked the heating and said that the pressure was low. He adjusted it, but I’ve still got no heat. I’ll call my worker again. I turn on the oven to low. That keeps the apartment warm, but at night, because of menopause, I get night sweats and have to open the door from my apartment to the hallway, to get some cool air in. That works fine.”

I asked, “Aren’t you worried about security, leaving your apartment door open?”

“No, there’s another door to the outside. Only me and my landlord have a key to that door.

“I haven’t been sleeping too well. I’ve been sick, throwing up every morning. I asked André to get me a bottle of sherry this morning to settle my stomach. I’m feeling a bit better now. I’m pissed off with him though. I’ve never led him on. I’ve told him I’m not interested in him and never will be; not if he were the last man on earth, but he keeps picking, picking. This morning he bent down to kiss me. I said, ‘Go away, man.’ He said, ‘It was worth a try, anyway.’ I said, ‘I talked to Debbie and she told me how you treated her.’ ‘Yeah, well I got a cut on my cheek.’ I said, ‘You deserved it.’ Here’s a woman who has opened her door to this guy, she feeds him. After he gets out of the shower, he comes out stark naked, with a hard-on, and says to her, ‘Take your clothes off and lie down on the bed.’ She said, ‘No fuckin’ way, man! Now, get out of here!’ He punched her in the chest, then backhanded her. If it was me I would have knocked him out, dropped him in the hall and threw his clothes on top of him.”

I said, “Apparently, he doesn’t believe in romance or foreplay.”

Joy said, “I asked her, ‘Did he at least have the decency to put on a condom?’ ‘No,’ she said. That was the day of the Dr. McGillicuddy’s fiasco.”

“What does that mean?”

“Andre and the boys were drinking Dr. McGillicuddy’s Peach Schnaps. That stuff’ll kill you. Chester was drunk too. He asked me why I was leaving, I said, ‘It’s cold. I want to go home and lie down. My legs are sore.’ He said, ‘Well, fuck you then. Maybe, I won’t let you have the rest of your stuff back.’ He staggered halfway across the bridge and did a face plant. Somebody phoned the police and he was taken by the paramedics to Hope Recovery.” If he did hold onto my stuff I’d feed his dentures to him piece by piece.

“I was always told to respect my elders. It doesn’t seem like Chester and I are that far apart in age now, but he’s nearly twenty years older than me. I take care of these guys, and they treat me like shit.

“I remember when my son called my mom a crusty old bitch. I sat him down at the table and said, ‘Don’t you ever talk to your grandmother like that again.’ He said, ‘She pissed me off.’ I said, ‘Don’t talk like that, and if she pissed you off it must have been something you did to cause it.’ He said, ‘So, you can talk that way and I can’t.’ ‘That’s right because I’m your mother.’ He said, ‘You lay a hand on me and I’ll call 911.’ I leaned towards him and gave him a head butt — knocked him out cold. My mother came in and said, ‘What did you do?’ I said, ‘I just knocked him out. He’s not dead or anything.’ When he came to he asked, ‘What did you do to me. That’s not right.’ I said, ‘I didn’t lay a hand on you. Now, I want you to apologize to your grandmother.’ He went over to her and said, ‘I’m sorry grandma, I won’t talk to you like that again.’ He never did either.”

…

At noon on the traffic island, I met eleven of my friends. Darren said, “I see you nearly every noon hour. What brings you up here?”

I said, “The conversations here are more interesting than what I hear at work.”

“Yeah, I guess that’s true, eh? We all have a story. I went to my worker to try to get my rent money, but she wouldn’t give it to me. She’s going to hold onto it until the first of December, then give it directly to my landlord. I didn’t fight it. She said to me, ‘If I give you this money you’re going to spend it on booze. Am I right?’ I wasn’t going to lie to her, I’m an alcoholic, the first thing alcoholics think about is booze. For me, it’s beer and the occasional joint.”

“I can understand that,” I said.

Joy saw Alphonse and Magdalene approach. She said, “Alphonse, the Salvation Army Outreach workers were looking for you this morning. You should call them.” Alphonse borrowed Jacques’s phone and arranged that the workers would meet him and Magdalene at the traffic island.

André passed Joy a joint, he said, “Don’t give it to Little Jake, because he’s been told he has a spot on his lung. It could be TB. He was honest about it, you’ve got to give him credit for that.”

Outcast said, “TB is the most contagious disease there is. You don’t want to share a joint with a person who is even suspected of having TB. It’s rough for Jake, but that’s the way it is.”

I sat next to Jake on the sidewalk. “How is it going in your new apartment? Do you have any more furniture?”

“I’ve got a bed and an air conditioner, still in the box. That’s all. Chris has a TV for me. I just have to find a way to get it to my place and get the cable hooked up.”

“It must be nice to have a place you can come home to, where you can lock the door, where you’re warm. It was only a few months ago that you were sleeping behind the dumpsters in the back of Starbucks.”

“Yeah, it’s good. I just wish I was feeling better. I’ve had a chest x-ray and a spot showed up on my lung. I don’t know what that’s all about. I’m throwing up every morning. I’ve got no appetite.” Jake also has HIV.

I asked, “Have you been eating?”

“No, just the thought of food makes me sick. I’m on two thousand milligrams of some kind of penicillin. When the pharmacist saw the prescription he said, ‘There must be a mistake here.’ I said, ‘That’s what the doctor gave me.’ He said, “That’s a very high dose.”

“Hippo,” I said, “How is your new apartment?

“I got a leak coming from the water main. It’s dripping down my wall. They’re going to have to replace the drywall. Apart from that everything’s fine. Tomorrow they’re having the Santa Claus Day parade.”

“Are you going to come down and see it?”

“No, I’ll just watch it on TV. Jacques, do you know when the Santa Claus Day parade starts?”

“I think it’s ten o’clock, I’ll have to check.”

It was time for me to leave. I shook hands all around and Shakes asked me, “Dennis, are you walking towards Laurier Street?”

“Yes.”

“Could you help me walk. I’ve been sitting too long and my knees are wobbly.”

“Okay, Shakes, no problem.” As we were walking I asked him, “Do you have problems with arthritis in your knees?”

“Yes, they get stiff.” As we passed the Lord Elgin Hotel Shakes said, “I’m going to stop in here. I’ve got to go for a whiz.”

“I’ll see you next week, Shakes.”

“Thanks, Dennis. I’ll see you.”

…

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Baghdad

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#author……https://buff.ly/2xHgS3p 

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13 November 2012

At noon, on the traffic island, were seven of my friends including Danny in his motorized wheelchair.

Daren said to me, “We’ve met before, haven’t we?”

“Yes,” I said, “I saw you yesterday and I also met you two years ago, across the street, where the benches used to be. You told me that you’d lived in Boston and that you’d been in the army.”

“It was the Marines. I was in Baghdad and Afghanistan. When we’d walk along the streets, there would be bodies just lying there on the sidewalks – dead bodies. We’d smell the rotting flesh.

“I’ve been getting these migraine headaches. It feels like someone hit me with a baseball bat at the back of my skull.”

I asked, “Was that because of your car accident?”

Alphonse said, “He’s had a tumor.”

“Yeah, where this missing patch of hair is. The surgery wasn’t so bad; it was the chemo that I really hated. I’d keep throwing up and wouldn’t be able to stop. It was every morning. I went to the doctor recently about the headaches. He ran some tests. I don’t want to go on morphine; I’ve already got one addiction, I don’t need another. I have to go back October thirty-first for the results, Halloween – I think it’s this Thursday — to get the results.”

“Darren,” said Alphonse, “it’s November thirteenth, Halloween was two weeks ago.”

“Do you mean I missed my appointment?”

I said, “It’s no problem, Darren, phone them, they can make another appointment for you.”

“I’ve been staying in shelters, but I hate it. To wake you up in the morning they kick you in the foot.”

I said, “I’ve heard that there are a lot of crack heads there, getting up every hour, walking around, keeping people awake.”

“Not only that, but they smoke crack in the bathrooms. The smell makes me sick. It’s like burning tires. My former wife used to be on crack. I’d wonder where all our money was going. We could never seem to get ahead. One day I came home and found two guys on top of her. One of them broke my leg. I took our two kids in the truck and they stayed with my mother. The next time I saw her she patted her backside and said, ‘Kiss my ass.’ That’s the last time I saw her.”

Alphonse said, “Magdalene has been going to a women’s shelter to have a shower and get cleaned up. She said there are always women smoking crack in the bathrooms.”

“Yeah,” said Magdalene. This morning I saw a woman with a hypodermic needle to her throat. I don’t know what she was shooting. I couldn’t believe it.”

Alphonse said, “We have some good news. We’ve applied for assisted housing and I think they’ve found us a place in Vanier. I think it’s on Lavergne Avenue. They still have some other applications to go through, but I think we’re going to get it. We’ll also get a ‘street allowance’ because we’re living on the street. We’ve also made an application for O.D.S.P. (Ontario Disability Support Program. We’ll be getting a health card and a bus pass.”

Darren said, “Congratulations! Lately, I’ve been sleeping outside. I really admire you guys — sleeping outside for two and a half years.

“I was in court this morning for a pre-sentence hearing. Do you know old Alphonse?”

“No,” I said.

“Anyway, old Alphonse gave these two kids money to buy a bottle. It was a girl and a guy. They never came back. Later on, I saw them. I grabbed the guy in a headlock and took him back to old Alphonse. He didn’t have the money, he’d spent it on crack, so I laid into him. I felt a hand on my shoulder and without thinking, I threw a punch. It was a cop. He didn’t identify himself. How was I to know? A couple of them jumped me, had me in handcuffs face down on the ground. One had his knee on the back of my neck. The others put the boots to me. It was the fat blond woman who split my ear. I think they have metal plates on the toes of their boots.

“One lawyer told me I should sue. Another told me to let it go. I’ve got until January first to prepare my statement.”

Ambrose said, “Something similar happened to me and Magdalene. We were panning on Metcalfe Street. A guy came along and lay down beside us. Magdalene told him to move along. He got up to swing at her and I clocked him right at the back of the jaw. He fell into the street. The police and ambulance came. I told them what happened; that I was just defending my woman. There was a woman nearby who also witnessed it. The cop said, ‘Alphonse, you shouldn’t have done that, but I understand why you did. Just move along and we’ll forget about it.”

”So, Dennis,” said Darren, “you seem to know what it’s like for us. Have you ever slept on the streets?”

“No, but my brother did. He slept on the streets of Calgary. After not eating for three days, he was ready to jump off a bridge, when someone suggested that he join the army. He had to lie on his application because he had been dishonorably discharged from the navy. When they found out that he’d given false information, he was already in Korea. Later, he became Eastern Canadian Boxing Champ. He was an alcoholic and got into lots of fights. He’s dead now — asphyxiated on his own vomit, sleeping in a Toronto hotel. He’d also been robbed and beaten.”

“I’m sorry to hear that,” said Darren.

“We sure got wet last night,” said Alphonse. “I gave Magdalene my inside pants because hers were soaked.”

I walked over to talk to Andre and Shakes. “Hi, Andre, how have you been?”

“So, now you decide to come over and talk to us. I thought we were being ignored.”

“No, Andre, it’s just that I haven’t seen Darren for a long time. How has it been going with your worker?”

“Thursday, I signed the papers for my health card. I filled out the application for housing. Now I’m just waiting. I see my worker again on Wednesday.

“Shakes and I slept outside last night. We were picked up on Bank Street. They phoned Hope Recovery. Shepherd’s said they had room for us. When we got there they said they were full, so they took us to the Sally. They said they were full – at nine o’clock they’re full. I think they were pulling something. I can’t believe that in buildings with four floors, that they couldn’t have found a space for us. I would have been happy to sleep on the basement floor. It would have been better than being in the rain, but they wouldn’t let us in.”

I asked, “Did Little Jake give you the bottle I brought you?”

“No, I saw him last night. He didn’t say anything about a bottle.”

“Friday, the afternoon you had the meeting with your worker, the police were writing tickets. You asked me if I could do you a favor and buy you a bottle. I said, ‘I’ll see what I could do.’ I knew that you guys would have had to pour out all your booze, so I brought back a bottle of Imperial sherry from the Rideau Street liquor store. You weren’t there so I gave the bottle to Frank. I said to him that you’d probably want to share it, and to make sure Shakes got a drink.”

“I didn’t know that. Thanks!” Actually, I didn’t pour out my booze. I didn’t have any to pour out. I was sober Friday, Saturday and Sunday. I spent the weekend at my cousin’s.

Shakes had his head down. With his hat on I could barely see his face. I bent down and looked into his eyes. “Hi, Shakes, how are you doing. Are you getting there?”

“Hi, Dennis, I’m getting there slowly but surely.”

“Shakes, I heard that you were robbed twice last week.”

“Yeah, twice.”

Andre said, “What happens is — it doesn’t matter if you have a padlock on your locker or not — guys will come in the middle of the night with bolt cutters and cut your lock. Everyone knows that Shakes will have a bottle, some pot and some change. I think it’s the staff, they’ve got access to bolt cutters.”

…

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Serge in Hospital

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23 October 2012

This morning, Andre was standing beside Joy’s spot. I said to him, “Don’t tell me, Joy had to pee.”

“You got it.”

“How’s your morning going, so far, Andre?”

“Lousy — twice, while I was panning, the cops pulled up and told me to move along.”

“How about trying someplace near Shakes’ ‘office’?”

“That’s where I was.”

“How about Silver’s old spot?”

“Little Jake’s there.” Joy returned. “I guess I should move along, let Joy get to work.”

After he left Joy said, That’s the third time he’s been by here. I finally had to tell him that he was interfering with my business.”

I asked, “Did he tell you when he’ll be going to court?”

“No, he didn’t show me the paper. He has two charges against him. One for the bottle of sherry, and one for $300.00 worth of meat from Loblaw’s. They found it in his backpack. He could hardly carry it.

“Have you heard about Serge?”

“No, I haven’t seen him lately.”

“He fell and hit the back of his head. I told him that he should go to the hospital to get it checked, but these guys are stubborn. The same with Silver, he had a swollen leg — instead of going to a hospital he went to the Shepherds, now he’s dead. Anyway, Serge had another fall. This time he hit his forehead. One side of his face is all bruised. He’s in Intensive Care at the Civic Hospital.”

“Are you sure it wasn’t a beating?”

“That was my first thought, but the medical staff at the hospital say that blood from his forehead is pooling in his cheek. The only thing keeping him alive is life support. They don’t know how to contact his family. There are so many Serge Roberts in the phone book.”

Chester came by but didn’t stay long. He saw a bag of mini chocolate bars that somebody had dropped for Joy. “Are those for me?” he asked. Joy just scowled. He left to talk to Jake, in Silver’s old spot.

“That asshole, yesterday I came home to find that he had invited Sylvain and Yves over. They had eaten all the soup. I had half a roast beef sandwich, from Tim Horton’s, that I put in the fridge. Albert asked, ‘Is that my supper?’ I said, ‘No, dude, you get your own. I’m tired of buying all the groceries for everyone else to eat.’

“Last week, I bought a dozen eggs, I got two. Of the pot of soup I made, I got one bowl. I stashed some bologna, Chester found it and ate that too. I said to him, ‘Chester, I haven’t eaten for days. Do you think of me at all?’

“I’m feeling so frustrated, and with Chester coughing all night I’m not getting any sleep.”

I said, “You have an appointment with your worker tomorrow. Do you think anything will come of that?”

“Yesterday, she was supposed to meet with Andre at ten o’clock. She didn’t show. I’m going to ask for a new worker. Janice is teaching this new girl. I thought they’d know what to do before they hire them. The time she’s taking for training is the time she’s not working on finding me a place.

“Pat and Chantal are the ones who found places for Hippo and Jake. I don’t like Pat, but if he can find me an apartment that’s all that matters. Otherwise, I’m thinking of asking them for a sleeping bag and go back to staying behind Starbucks. I’d leave my stuff at Chester’s.

“Sometimes, I just don’t want to be here.”

“Do you mean panhandling?”

“I used to be able to take a break when I got my check, but now I can’t. I just don’t want to be on this earth.”

…

I phoned the Civic Hospital to inquire about Serge’s condition. Telling them that I was his brother, I was able to speak to the nurse in the Intensive Care Unit. She said, ‘He was doing okay, but he kept losing consciousness, so we brought him into ICU to keep an eye on him. He has a breathing tube now. He’s suffered a cerebral hemorrhage — bruising and bleeding to the brain. We’re hoping to take the breathing tube out tomorrow, see how he is then. We’ll just take it one day at a time.’

…

At noon I joined a half dozen of my friends sitting on the curb were a half dozen of my friends. Shortly after, Andre rode up on his bicycle with a large bottle of water for Joy. Luther, by all accounts, has been alive, sober and staying with his girlfriend.

He said, “Dennis, I told you I’d get my guitar back, and here it is. I had an electric, but I sold it.

“Do you know what happened to my baby? They chopped her up. I saw the body. It was her sixteenth birthday party. They got out of control with booze and drugs. That’s why I drink. How do I forget about something like that?

“I’m also evil, especially when I drink, that’s what my girlfriend says. The doctors say I have psychotic tendencies.”

I said, “Don’t worry, Luther, that can be treated. I know you’re a good man.”

“I’m not Ojibwa,” he said, “I’m Dene. Do you know many Dene people?”

“Some,” I said.

“Do you know them to be honorable people?”

“Very honorable.”

“Would you give me money to buy a beer?”

“I don’t carry cash, but I can give you a card for a sandwich.”

“Okay,” he said. I handed him the card.

“Actually, I have another of these. I could sell them for $2.50 each, enough for a bottle.”

“It’s your choice, Luther.”

“No, I’ll give it back to you. Give it to someone who is hungry.”

“What was that all about,?” asked Joy.

Luther said, “I don’t mind accepting money, but I don’t want to be told what to spend it on.”

I asked Joy, “How have things been since this morning?”

“Okay, I’m not too happy about Luther and Gnome being here.”

Andre said, “It wouldn’t take much for me to ask them to leave.”

“I don’t mind asking him to leave, don’t worry.”

Luther said, “Ugly Rambo sitting with the pretty Indian woman.”

“Luther,” said Joy, “I don’t appreciate you making remarks about my friend, Dennis!”

“Joy,” said Emile, “he’s referring to my uncle. They used to call him Rambo. He was going out with Luther’s sister. It’s a long story.”

“Well,” said Joy, “I don’t want to hear it.”

Andre asked Joy, “Can I bum a cigarette?”

“Okay, this time, but that’s it. I appreciate you getting the bottle of water for me and doing a liquor run before that, but you’re becoming too much of a burden to carry. That goes for all these guys.”

Andre said, “I understand, Joy.”

…

Later in the day, I phoned Center507, the outreach program that had taken Serge to the hospital. The outreach workers had already left for the day, but I left my phone number in case I could be of any help in finding Serge’s family. I hope to visit him in the hospital, but they may have visiting restricted to immediate family only.

…

Serge is now in the Intensive Care Unit of the Civic Hospital, bed 29. He’s had a cerebral hemorrhage. Because he kept losing consciousness he now has a breathing tube. They expect to remove the breathing tube tomorrow or the next day. They don’t have plans for any surgery. He has been admitted previously for falls.

I visited him tonight, but he was asleep the whole time. He is under light sedation and is being administered Tylenol for pain. His head has been shaved, he has a bruise on his forehead and his right eye is black, apart from that he appeared to be resting comfortably. I was surprised that they had his age listed as 55.

The hospital was having trouble contacting his family. There are so many families with the surname Roberts in the phone book that it would be difficult to contact them all.

…

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Fuck Puppet

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22 October 2012

When I arrived at Joy’s spot this morning, she said, “Man, am I glad to see you. Have a seat on my cushion, it’s warm. I’ll be back in a few minutes.”

When she got back I asked her, “How was your weekend?”

“It was quiet. I don’t know what was going on with my stomach, but I couldn’t keep anything down. I made some really good soup in my crock pot. We had leftover chicken, I added veggies, rice and noodles, but I couldn’t even keep that down. Most of the weekend I slept or watched TV from my bed.”

“How has Chester been?” I asked.

“He was okay Saturday until he went to the Mission for his supper. When he came home he started coughing. I said to him, ‘Chester, now is the time to cut back on the cigarettes for a while.’ He chain smokes, one right after another. When he coughs he makes a really loud noise, like a dog barking, so I didn’t get much sleep last night.

“This morning, he got up just after I did. First thing, he had a cigarette, then the coughing started again. I said to him, ‘Have some chicken soup and rest for the day.’ He said he would. He may come down and visit with the boys for a while.”

“Did anything happen after I left Friday,” I asked.

“Not much, I got into it with red-haired Debbie.”

“It was funny — some of the government ladies, who come out for a smoke, saw us. They were talking to me today. They asked, ‘What was going on between you and that woman? We thought you were going to kill her. It was hilarious.’ I said, ‘I’m glad I was able to provide you some entertainment. I wouldn’t have killed her, but I would have come close.’ They asked, ‘What did you have against her?’ I said, ‘Do you mean besides the fact that she’s a fuck puppet for all the guys, and has a big mouth?’ They asked, ‘What do you mean by that?’ I said, ‘She’s slept with Chester, Andre, Little Jake –I don’t know about Jacques — anyone else that’s been around. She has AIDS and doesn’t use condoms. Little Jake had HIV, but he must have full-blown AIDS by now.’

“I said to the ladies, ‘You should see me with the guys. I don’t take shit from anybody. If someone gets smart with me they’ll get either a punch or a kick in the head. I can take care of myself, believe me.’ They said they thought I could.”

“By the way, Andre may be in jail now. Chester saw him coming out of the liquor store. As soon as he cracked his bottle, two security guards grabbed him. I’ve told him before, ‘If you boost a seven dollar and forty-five cent bottle of sherry and lose your freedom, is that a good trade?’ ”

I said, “He told me he never boosted from liquor stores, well, only once.”

“It was more than once, believe me.”

…

At noon the sidewalk curbs were crowded with half a dozen friends on either side. Joy made room for me and Jacques gave me a copy of the Metro to sit on. Joy was talking to the group, “I was told by a lady cop that, in their opinion, one of Ottawa’s finest is a serial killer, responsible for the murders of prostitutes over the last ten years. It would make sense — a person with power and authority, armed.”

“How about the cop that beat you up, Joy?” asked Andre.

“I didn’t report it. I went through that in Toronto, I didn’t want to go through it again.”

I asked, “What happened with Andre?”

“He was charged. He’ll have to appear in court.

“I grew up with this guy. His name was Luke. He was a handsome guy, but he became a tranny — called himself Lucy. He made a gorgeous woman, but a guy can never hide his Adam’s apple. He was out with a guy who thought he was a chick. When the guy found out, he killed him.

“I knew a lot of transvestites in Toronto. They were really nice to me — invited me to all their parties. I was a fat chick, but I was cute. The apartment they lived in was beautiful, draped fabric in the living room, like a tent. It was really over the top, but nice. Someone handed me a pellet-shaped lump of hash. I said, ‘What do I do with this?’ The guy said, go into the bathroom and take it like a suppository, up your ass. It will give you a body high as opposed to a head high.’ I went into the bathroom, but I put the hash in my purse. I didn’t want to be any more fucked up than I was. When I came out of the bathroom the guy asked me, ‘How does it feel?’ I said, ‘It feels a little uncomfortable.’ He said, ‘You must be a virgin.’ People kept handing me this stuff. They were stoned, but I put it all in my purse. By the end of the evening, I had a half ounce of hash. I didn’t need to hook at all.”

Weasel said, “Do you remember that cop we called Sasquatch? I met this woman at the Mission, we started getting it on, then she invited me over to her apartment. A while later we heard a loud knock on the door. I’m standing in my underwear. She opens the door and it’s Sasquatch, all seven-foot two of him. The woman was his former girlfriend. When he got through with me, even my socks were soaked with blood. Has anyone seen him around?”

Andre said, “He’s in Cornwall. He’s my uncle. I can remember we were at a party one time. He leaned on the apartment door — the whole thing came down and went through the door opposite. He was standing there looking sheepish. The people from across the way were dumbfounded. He said, “I guess I shouldn’t lean on doors anymore.”

Joy yelled across the sidewalk to Glenda, “What are you drinking?”

“Wiser’s, Devil’s Cut.”

Joy said, “Would you mind keeping it under your sweater, or in your bag. The cops come here regularly. I wouldn’t want to see you get a ticket and have to pour out your whiskey.”

To me, she said, “Look at Shakes, he’s laying in the middle of the sidewalk. This crowd is just asking for trouble. In a few minutes, I’m moving down about twenty feet to where the benches used to be.

“Glenda, Debbie and Gnome drank all Shakes’ sherry, smoked all his cigarettes and all his pot. Now that they have whiskey, do you think they’re going to share with him? No way! Glenda asked me where the liquor store was. I told her, ‘Go straight down Albert, two blocks to Metcalfe. You’ll see the World Exchange on your right. Go inside, it’s the first store on the left. You can’t miss it.’ She asked, ‘Will you come with me?’ I said, ‘No, for one thing, I’m barred, for another, I have everything I need, besides that,  I don’t know you.’ With her size, she’d be slow getting up. I should be able to get a few shots in, but if she caught hold of me I’d be in trouble. What do you think?

“Actually when I look around, there aren’t too many people here I would trust. Jake may remember something, sometime, and just blurt it out. Hippo is too soft. Andre and Jacques, I don’t know. Shakes, I’d trust him with my life, in fact, I have. He stood up to Big Jake to protect me until I told him to just stay down. There was no point in both of us taking a beating. Nobody could take on Jake.”

To Chester Joy said, “When you leave, I’m going to give you my cigarettes to take home. Andre’s been bumming off me all day, so has Shakes.”

…

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1000 Ways To Die

.

.

25 September 2012

I saw Joy briefly this morning. Already packed up, she asked me to watch her backpack while she went into Tim Horton’s to use their washroom.

When she returned she said, “They were mopping the floor in there. They’ve got to change the brand of their cleaner. It smells like wet dog, even worse than Bear, it’s horrible. The stuff they use the first thing in the morning is even worse. I could never eat there with that odor in the air.

“Weasel was by earlier with Bear. Because of that dog, he collects more money than any of us. Now he has Little Jake caring for the dog while he goes off someplace. He’s always getting somebody to stay with Bear: Wolf, Andre, Hippo.  And he never pays them, not even a beer. There’s no way I’d look after that dog. For one thing, you never know when he’s coming back, it could be days. Then you’re stuck with feeding him, cleaning up after him.

I said, “I’m sorry I didn’t make it to the park yesterday. I had a dental appointment that took longer than I expected.”

“What did you have done?”

“I got a partial plate, to replace three missing molars.”

“I don’t have any back teeth. It makes chewing difficult. I have my boyfriends to thank for that.”

“Yesterday, everybody was asking, ‘Where’s Dennis?’ We thought that maybe you had been in an accident, or that something had happened to you. You’ve hardly ever missed being at the park at noon.”

I asked, “What did I miss?”

“Not much, the usual. Jacques was there, Chester, Shakes and Serge. Andre and Little Jake weren’t there, thank God. I guess Shakes and Andre were together on Sunday.  Shakes lost his backpack. He’s hoping that Andre has it. Shakes said to me, ‘Without my bag, where am I going to put my booze?’ I said, ‘Shove it up your sleeve, where you usually put it.’ ”

“Weasel was by earlier with Bear. Because of that dog, he collects more money than any of us. Now he has Little Jake caring for the dog while he goes off someplace. He’s always getting somebody to stay with Bear: Wolf, Andre, Hippo.  And he never pays them, not even a beer. There’s no way I’d look after that dog. For one thing, you never know when he’s coming back, it could be days. Then you’re stuck with feeding him, cleaning up after him.

I said, “I’m heading off to work now. Will see you at the park later?”

“I’ll be there.”

…

This afternoon, as I was approaching the group, I saw Hippo, standing head and shoulders above everyone else. I gave him a wave and he waved back.

“Hi Hippo!” I said, “I haven’t seen you around much.”

“I haven’t been around. I fucked up again.”

“It’s good to see you.”

It’s good to see you, Dennis.”

I shook hands all around. Joy and Andre were discussing the television program ‘1000 Ways To Die’ (now on YouTube) —  the ways that people have accidentally killed themselves — winners of the Darwin Award.

Joy said, “This one woman was masturbating with a carrot. It tore her vaginal wall, she developed an air embolism and died. The title of the video is ‘kill-do’, that’s hilarious. You’ll never see me masturbating with a carrot.”

Andre said, “One guy accidentally touched his crotch with a live cable from a battery. He liked the feeling, so he wrapped his penis in tinfoil and plugged it into a live socket in the house. He was electrocuted and died.”

Joy said to Jacques, “Have you got any wine ready to be turned?”

“I don’t have any wine. Oh, you mean at the house? Yes I have one batch ready to be transferred. I like to transfer a little at a time.”

Steve came over to Jacques and handed him a ticket, probably a liquor violation. “Another one for my wall?” asked Jacques. “I must have over a hundred stapled to my wall now, and I have two stuffed envelopes to be put up. I want to take them to my new place. I hope I can get them all down.”

Andre said, “What you need is one of those special staple removers. You’re going to need to fill a lot of holes in your walls before you move out. You can fill the small holes with a bar of soap or a stick of deodorant. It can even be painted over. You’ve got to use the chalky stuff, not the gel.”

Joy said, “The last time I was over at Jacques’, I tried to find my name on that wall. I’m sure I must be there a couple of times.”

“Andre,” I said, “you’ve shaved again.”

“Yeah, I’m trying to clean myself up a bit. Nothing too drastic. I want to set little goals for myself. If I meet one goal, I can set another. If I tried to do it all at once, I’d screw up, for sure.”

I asked, “Did Shakes find his backpack? Did you have it?”

“No, I was up on Greenwood, the opposite side of town to where Shakes was. I noticed earlier in the day that he seemed to be having trouble carrying his bag. Me and some others offered to carry it for him, but he said, ‘I can carry my own damn bag!’ You know Shakes. When you sleep outside, people will just come by and help themselves to your stuff. I know, it’s happened to me.”

Andre asked Hippo, “Where are you staying now.”

“At a hostel in Gatineau. I’m going for a butt run now, then I”m going back across the bridge.”

Joy said, “We call that Pepperville.”

To Andre, she said, “He said they were feeding him well over there, but he’s lost weight.”

Andre replied, “It’s probably all the walking he’s been doing. It’s a long way from that hostel to here.”

“Joy,” I asked, “did you mention to me this morning that you don’t have any back teeth.”

“Yeah, that’s thanks to boyfriends. My teeth got punched out or broken. When I was in prison the broken, half teeth, got infected. It was considered an emergency, so I had them extracted right away.”

“How are the dentists in there?”

“Some are good, but you can get some real butchers. I love the drugs you get when they put you in the medical ward. I was high all weekend”

Andre said, “I’ll be able to get all my teeth extracted. I’m just going to get them to put me out. They’re going to help me get some dentures, upper and lower. Most of mine have been knocked out in fights.”

Joy said, “Tomorrow, my worker, Angie, is going to be meeting me, to take me to Elizabeth Fry. She apologized that she couldn’t get the Salvation Army van. We’ll be taking the bus up to Bronson and Gladstone — somewhere around there. I think we take the number 86. I prefer her to Janice — she seems afraid of me, she’s so uptight. It’s probably because I say it like it is. I don’t pussyfoot around. I’ll tell you what time it is.

“They’re going to be escorting me to every class, usually with the van, so I don’t get breached. That’s the only way I would go to that course. I shouldn’t even be required to take anger management.

“Andre, you and I are going to have to chip in and buy Dennis a new pair of shoes. He could give you the ones he’s wearing for panning shoes.”

…

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Native Cigarettes

.

.

14 September 2012

This morning was pleasant. Metro greeted me waving a newspaper, “Good morning, Dennis. Are you going to keep out of trouble this weekend?”

“Not if I can help it, Metro. Have a good day.”

“Joy’s down there.”

“Great, thanks Metro.”

“Hi Joy, how did you sleep?”

“Great, when I woke up I thought it was 5:15, my usual time, but it was 6:15. I really had to scramble to get everything together. When I got outside the door, I realized that my keys were at the bottom of my bag. So, I just left the door unlocked. We always used to leave the door unlocked. We never had any problems.”

“Weren’t you afraid that someone would steal Chester?”

“They can have him. He was all pissed off last night because I came home late.”

“Why, on earth, should he care what time you come home?”

“Ever since he fell down the stone steps, backwards, he hasn’t been right in the head. Every woman he’s been involved with, in any way, he falls in love with. Sometimes, I hear him talking in his sleep, ‘Joy, I love you.'”

“Has he made any arrangements, with the Health Department, for an exterminator?”

“Yeah, somebody is supposed to come by on Monday, but I told Chester, ‘I don’t care. If everything goes well at my appointment this afternoon, I’ll be out of here soon — maybe, even next week.’

“He may come by later. He’s out of cigarettes, so he’ll probably be doing a butt run. He’ll be wanting to bum a cigarette from me as well; but I smoke natives, he prefers a stronger cigarette.”

“What are natives?” I asked.

“They’re made from the scraps of what they use to make tailor-mades. The tobacco is supposed to be for ceremonial purposes. It’s not meant for human consumption.”

“Who makes them?”

“Natives.”

“At $20 a carton, some young entrepreneurs from the Kanasatake reserve near Montreal are selling a lot of cigarettes. The brands they are pushing may be unfamiliar to most people – Native and Mohawk Blend – but they come from a manufacturing plant on the American side of the Mohawk reserve in Akwasasne.”

“Making cigarettes has become an important business in Akwasasne. There are two manufacturing plants employing a couple of hundred people. The cigarettes are sold in native communities all across the United States, and now in some Canadian communities as well.”

“I was talking to Timmy the other day. He said that smoking them gives him the dry heaves in the morning, and he’s been coughing up blood. He figures it’s not the liquor that gives him a hangover, it’s the native cigarettes.

“On the number fourteen bus last night I saw, Kit’s brother, Ronny. He must live ear where Little Jake moved in, and where Irene move out.”

“I don’t want to live near any of those people. My worker was surprised that I wanted to live in Vanier. She said a lot of hookers are moving from Vanier to Carlington, but there are still a lot in Vanier. I probably know them all. Jacques won’t live in Vanier. I’ve never had any problems there.”

I said, “I’ve lived in Vanier. I liked it. I never had any problems.

“I couldn’t believe how quiet Shakes was yesterday,” I said.

“Yeah, that was something, wasn’t it? I think he’s still upset about being robbed. I’ve told those guys that sleep at the Sheps, or the Mission, “Don’t store money in your socks.” I said, “Put it in a plastic baggie and stuff it in your underwear. If someone touches your crotch, you’re going to wake up.”

“It’s strange that Shakes and Andre were both robbed within days of each other.”

Joy said, “I think it was Sharron who got Andre’s money. When she was at the park I saw her rearranging her bra a few times, as if something felt uncomfortable. I think that’s where she hid Andre’s money.” Andre said, ‘I had my hand down her top a few times. I’d have noticed if it was there.’ I said, ‘If she had it right at the bottom of her cup, you’d never know it.’

I said, “Andre told me that he was robbed by two guys and one of them kicked him in the head.”

Joy said, “He put up a fight when the money was taken from his sock, but I kicked him in the head. He kept touching me. I warned him, “Next time you do that you’re going to regret it. He put his hand on my thigh. I stood up and kicked him in the head. He tried it a second time, I kicked him again. You think he’d learn. He put his hand right on my crotch. I got up and kicked him with all my might. The third kick was the best. It connected with the back of his head, his head snapped foreward and bobbled — just like one of those bobble-headed figures. He was out cold. Chester and I left shortly after that. He said, ‘Do you think he’s okay? Maybe he has a broken neck. I said, ‘I don’t care if he has.” Then we left.

“He was by here this morning, he’s okay. He was hanging around — I finally had to tell him to move on. This is Friday, it’s government pay week. I’ve got to make some money.”

“Maybe I should move on.”

“Whatever you like. You could go talk to Andre. I saw him going around the corner. He’s probably panning in front of Timmy Ho’s. I’ll see you this afternoon anyway, I have to be at the park to meet my worker. She’s coming at 2:00.”

…

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Sweet Grass

.

.

11 September 2012

Today on the curb, by the park, were six of my friends. I sat on the sidewalk in front of Joy. Shortly after, Andre came staggering up the walk, followed by Sharron. The sides of his track pants were unsnapped, his shirt was off. He had a four-foot length of gold chain with two-inch links, a padlock attached to the end, wrapped twice around his neck.

“What do you mean I’m acting like an asshole?” asked Andre? He started swinging the chain. Joy said, “Andre, if you hit Jake in the back of the head with that padlock, I’m going to kill you. You know I mean it.”

Andre sat down, “I’m sorry for being an asshole. I’m just waking up. I passed out in a park last night. You all know what that’s like.”

Joy said, “Been there, done that, couldn’t afford the tee-shirt.”

Shakes, who was surprisingly sober, said, “I think Andre’s still upset about being rolled last night.”

I asked, “Is that right Andre? How much did they take? Was it a gang?”

“No,” said Andre, “It was just two guys. They got a hundred and forty bucks, but I did quite a bit of damage to one guy. I had him in a head lock and was punching him in the face, when the other guy kicked me in the side of the head. Things are a bit confused after that.”

Shakes asked, “Do you have my radio? I lost it twice yesterday.”

I said, “That means you must have found it once.”

“Yes, I did.”

Debbie said, “Have you seen Jake’s new apartment? I was there last night. It’s gorgeous. The walls are freshly painted, the floors have been varnished. Jake’s bedroom is as big as his living room.”

Jake said, “They even gave me fifty bucks for groceries. Tomorrow they’re going to see about getting me some furniture, even a television.”

Joy said, “I’ve got an appointment to see an apartment in Vanier. It’s six hundred a month.”

I said, “You saw one on Beechwood didn’t you?”

“I had an appointment, but my worker cancelled at the last-minute. They wanted seven ninety-five for that one. I’d only have fifty dollars left, after I cashing my check.”

Two workers from the Housing Outreach Program of the Salvation Army came by. One said, “Shakes, can we meet with you tomorrow around 10:30.”

“Sure.”

Joy said, “I’ll make sure he’s here, because I have an appointment with my worker tomorrow at the same time.”

After they left Joy said, “I got four dollars. Has anybody got any change? Andre, in the mesh pocket of your backpack I can see some change.” Andre threw over two quarters and a dime.

Joy said, “Okay, I’ve got $4.60. I still need forty-five cents.” Everyone checked their pockets and came up with the needed change.

To Chester, Joy said, “Honey, would you mind going to the World Exchange and picking me up a bottle?”

“Sure,” said Albert, “and if they don’t have Imperial? I’ve been there sometimes when they’ve been out.”

“If they don’t have it, don’t bother getting anything. It would only make me sick.”

“Jake,” I asked, “Are you moving into the apartment that Irene moved out of?”

“No, it’s the next building on Moriset — different apartment, different building. I’m really going to make it work this time.”

Joy said, “Every Fall the workers try to get us off the street and into apartments, that way they don’t have to bury so many of us.”

Shakes pulled a new bottle of sherry out of his backpack. He cracked the seal, poured some into the cap and threw it over his shoulder. Then he handed the bottle to Joy, who poured some into her coke bottle, then passed it back to Shakes who took a sip from the bottle. Joy then reached into her backpack for a large Sprite bottle of partly frozen water. She added water to the sherry then took a drink.

Jake said, “I’m going to get some sweet grass to smudge my apartment.”

Joy said, “Sweet grass has a beautiful smell, especially when it’s mixed with sage, burnt properly and wafted with an eagle feather. It’s so relaxing and peaceful.”

…

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Couch Surfing

.

.

7 September 2012

Today at the park the weather was pleasant, but the mood was tense. Sitting on the curb were six of my friends. Facing them on the sidewalk were Andre and Clint.

“Andre,” I said, “How did it go with your worker on Wednesday? Did you get your papers signed for housing?”

“I got a lot of things sorted. They set me up with a street allowance because I said, ‘Hey, I sleep behind a dumpster, or if I’m lucky I do some couch surfing.’ So, on Monday I’ll be able to pick up a check for $200.00.

“I’m forty-six years old, I can’t be on the street like Weasel and Jake. I’m going to get on the ball, go to my appointments — They’re giving me a monthly bus pass, otherwise I’d have to go there to pick up bus tickets every time I have to see somebody — With O.D.S.P. (Ontario Disability Support Program) alone, I have to go nine times a month. I have to go to the doctor twice a week, then there’ll be visits for housing.

“I’m staying at the Sally Ann right now. That’s good, because that’s where my workers are. If I need to contact them, after hours, I can just slip a message under their door. If they need to contact me they can come to my room, or leave a message for me. I know they’re going to work really hard to get me settled.”

Clint said, “The best fish and chips I’ve ever had were at the Sally Ann in Halifax. Every Friday they’d serve them. It was a great big plate and the fries were just like you’d get at a fish and chip shop — hand cut, crispy.

“I got in trouble at a dance there. I was dancing with a woman — I didn’t know she had a boyfriend. It turned out that he had boxed for ten years in prison. He broke my nose, broke my jaw — I had to have it wired shut. Now, If I yawn, sometimes it’ll lock open.”

Andre said, “That’s why I don’t go to dances. I was at a dance one time — I was drunk, I started dancing by myself, I turned around and, you know how it is, I was dancing with three women. I was having fun, clowning around, then three guys showed up. They’d been there all the time, but they didn’t want to dance, that’s why the women were dancing together.

“The first guy caught me with a left hook. It was a good left hook, flattened my nose to one side. The next guy hit me with a right hook, flattened my nose to the other side. By this time my white tee-shirt was red. I said to the third guy, ‘bring it on, let’s see if you can get my nose straight again.’ ”

“I’ve had my jaw broken, ” Said Joy. “Isn’t it great having to get all your nutrition through a straw?”

Joy kept looking down the line at Mina. Andre said, “Just take a few deep breaths and count to ten.”

Joy was punching her fist into her open palm. “You don’t know the half of it. That Chester is so stupid. It was Raven’s old man who stole Chester’s bank card and drained his bank account. And how did he get in? Raven! Now he wants to invite her over to where I’m staying. Over my dead body!

“I’m feeling really pissy today. I didn’t get much sleep last night. I was awake chasing cooties most of the night. I’ve found out that the mature bed bugs have a numbing agent, so you can’t feel when they bite, but the young ones don’t seem to know about that. You can feel when they bite. They start out kind of colorless, then turn orange when they suck your blood. When you crush them between your thumb and finger, they have a rotten wood smell about them.”

I asked, “Do you sniff every bug you crush?”

“Every one. See all these bites I have below my knees? I’ve got them all over my body. They’re either from the bed bugs or from the spiders I bring in from the balcony to eat the bed bugs.”

Andre said, I remember going to visit a guy in Guelph, at the Bluebird Hotel, I think it was. It was a long time ago. Anyway, we were going to go to his room. He couldn’t get the key in the lock — he was that drunk. So, I had to unlock the door for him. I turned on the light and there were thousands of roaches everywhere. The walls looked alive with them scrambling away. He asked, ‘Do you want to sit down?’ I said, ‘No way, man! I don’t want to be carrying those things to the next place I go.'”

Joy said, “I think my lungs are worse since I moved into Chester’s place.”

I asked, “Is it because of the bed bug spray, or are you using the powder now?”

“The powder is better, but I’ve run out of that too.”

Andre asked? “Do you dust it over all the carpets?”

“I sprinkle it only in the area where I sleep. Chester is on his own. I wash and dry my clothes, cook them, powder them, bag them and put them out on the balcony. Chester takes his clothes out of the bags and puts them in his drawers. He won’t listen to me.

“Now he says he’s broke. I gave him money for food, but that’s not what he spent it on. At least I have a Tim Horton’s card if I get hungry. Last night I made spaghetti sauce. Tonight I’m turning it into chilli. I’ve got it in the crock pot now. Chester asked, ‘Can I still put it on noodles?’ I said, ‘Do anything you want with it.’

“I’m going to go home now, before Chester gets there, so I’ll be able to watch English television. Sometimes, I’ll be in the middle of watching a movie and Chester will say, ‘I don’t like this,’ and he’ll switch over to one of his French channels.

“He gets up so early. This morning he got up just as I was falling into a deep sleep. First thing, he goes to the fridge for a beer, then he lights a cigarette. As soon as he does that I start coughing, and I have to use my inhaler. I wish there was a door he could close. At least he doesn’t smoke in bed. That would really scare me.

“Andre, can I ask you something that I never thought I’d ask?”

“Sure.”

“Will you come sit between me and Jake. He’s driving me nuts with his babbling. It’s all I can do to keep from punching him.”

To me she said, “The only reason I don’t punch him is because he’s HIV positive, or has full-blown AIDS.”

Andre said, “Jake, will you wipe your mouth, you’re drooling.”

To Joy he said, “If he needs straightening out, I’ll do it.”

Chester came over to Joy. She said, “What is it honey? Do you want to sit on your blanket?” She pulled it out from under her and handed it to him.. “Come sit down.”

Chester took the blanket and went back to sit with Raven. Andre said, “I thought he was going to sit with us.”

“So did I,” said Joy. “I think part of the reason I feel so schizoid is because of menopause.”

I asked, “Are they any closer to getting your health card and other identification?”

“Yeah,” she said, “I just have to go in and fill in some personal stuff about my parent’s birth dates and my mother’s maiden name. I have all that. They were both born in 1944, My father was such an asshole.” Joy was weeping as I left.

…

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Silver

.

.

27 August 2012

This morning I went over to see Silver, panning in front of Starbucks. He was sitting on a plastic box. When I said hello, he was startled, he may have dozed off. “Hi Dennis, you snuck up on me.”

“How are you feeling, Silver?”

“Fine.”

“How is your stomach?”

“I’m going to see my doctor on Wednesday. I still don’t have any appetite and haven’t been sleeping well. Look at my ankles. See how swollen they are. Those aren’t my ankles at all.

“I think I’m getting what my mother had, varicose veins. See, beside my knee and down my calf.”

“How did it go, panning at the church yesterday?”

“Not good.”

“Is that the one on Kent or on Sparks?”

“On Sparks, the one on Kent is where I was assaulted last spring. I didn’t even have to phone the cops. Two women from church were witnesses and there was a cop right on the corner. I was going to get up and talk to the cop, but the two women said, ‘Silver, you stay right here. We’ll deal with this.’

“When they came back they said, ‘Silver, you need to go to the hospital for stitches.’ I said, ‘No, just give me a couple of band-aids. It’ll heal better that way.”

I said, “I see you have a scar in your right eyebrow. Is that where you were hit?”

“That’s it.”

“So, what happened Sunday?”

“Where?”

“At the church on Sparks, you said it didn’t go well.” I said.

“No, I didn’t have a problem.”

“I’ve been taking a bit of a break lately. Trying to catch up on my sleep. On the weekend I watched a bunch of Clint Eastwood and John Wayne movies.”

I said, “I’ve always enjoyed those. ‘Pale Rider’ with Clint Eastwood is one of my favorites; another, is ‘Rooster Cogburn’ with John Wayne.”

“’Pale Rider’ is one of the ones I watched on the weekend.”

“I guess you’ll be getting your check soon.”

“Yeah, Sally will be around with it on Wednesday. I also want to get some laundry detergent and some socks from her.

“Were you up on the hill, Friday?” asked Silver.

“Yes I was.”

“Did the piggies come by?”

“Yes they did. They didn’t give out any tickets or ask us to move. Willy dumped part of his beer and Wolf had his hidden.”

“I was in the market. I saw them ride by and decided not to go to the park. I stayed at the loading dock where I often go. I’ve never been hassled there.”

…

On the way to the park at noon, I stopped to talk with Serge, “How are you doing today, Serge?”

“I’m fine.”

“On Friday you said you weren’t feeling very well.”

“When did I say that?”

“You were sitting on the bench, on Elgin Street, with William. I asked how you were. You said, ‘Not so good.’ ”

“I was tired,” he said. “I went beneath the bridge, where it was quiet, and I slept for a while. I felt better after that. Yesterday, I went up the stairs at the Art Centre and had a sleep up there.”

“So, your feeling better now?”

“Yeah, I got my booze,” he chuckled.

“I’m going up to the park. I’ll see you on my way back.”

“See you.”

At the park, sitting on the curb were seven of my human friends and a dog.

“How are you, Dennis?” asked Bruce.

“I’m fine, how about you?”

“I’m waiting here for my worker. She’s taking me to fill out the forms for housing. I’ll also have to get my picture taken – my health card has expired.

“Apart from that, it’s been a slow day. I was panning since 6:00 this morning and made 87 cents. I’m going to lose the busiest part of my working day, getting forms filled out, but it has to be done.”

I said, “Joy doesn’t do Mondays.”

“Wolf,” asked Bruce, “can I have a cigarette?” Wolf pulled out a clear plastic bag and threw him a cigarette. Bruce casually caught it in one hand. He lit it and said, “Shakes, can I have a sip from your bottle?” Shakes tossed the bottle and Bruce plucked it out of the air. He took a sip then tossed it back to Shakes who easily caught it in one hand.

Bruce said, “If that had been a sandwich or a ball I would have fumbled it, but a cigarette or a bottle, I never miss.”

I said to Silver, “You mentioned that you didn’t have a good day at the church on Sunday.”

“Did I say that? I think I meant to say, I didn’t make as much money as usual. Normally, I get from thirty to forty bucks. Yesterday, I think I got about twenty. At Christmas, one of my regulars dropped me five twenties. When he gave it to me I said, ‘This feels like more than a twenty.’ He didn’t say anything. I folded it, put it in my pocket. I didn’t count it until I got home.

”It has been slow lately. I blame it on the drifters — these people who live with their parents in the winter. When it comes spring the parents give them a hundred bucks and tell them to live somewhere else for a while. When winter comes they’re crying to their mommies and daddies to let them come home again.”

Bruce said to me quietly, “I could never pan in front of a church. I have nothing against those who do, but to me it seems wrong.”

Shakes said, “This morning I was just twenty cents short, to buy two bottles. Darren was going for a run, so I said to him, ‘Just bring me one for now.’”

Wolf motioned for me to move closer, “Don’t worry about Shaggy. She’ll be fine as long as you don’t touch her, or be aggressive.

”I was listening to these guys talking about panning, five or six days a week and getting maybe seven dollars. I couldn’t do that. Panning is hard work. Shaggy and I go out maybe once a week.

“I went to court Friday. Did I tell you about that? I was charged , a few months ago, with animal cruelty. Can you imagine that? Two women — I don’t know who they were — reported me to the police. It was just in the parking lot, behind where I live. I guess these women didn’t like the way I was putting Shaggy in her cart. They said I was too rough. I was walking along the sidewalk, pushing her cart, when three police cars screeched to a stop. They took my dog.

“You know, that dog means everything to me. I got her back the next day. I talked to my lawyer about it. He said I could plead guilty, or ask for a trial date. He recommended going to trial. Friday, they set the date for February 24. He said to contact him about two weeks before the trial. Last time, I got over a hundred signatures, from my friends and regulars, saying that I had never mistreated Shaggy.

“I rough house with her, but she always comes out on top. I’ve got the scars to prove it.”

Bruce’s worker came by. “Is Jake here?” she asked.

“No,” said Bruce. “I don’t know where he is.”

She said, “If any of you see him, tell him that I’ll be by here at noon tomorrow, to pick him up. Tell him that it’s very important.”

“Bruce, are you ready to go?”

“Yeah, just let me refill my bottle,”

Silver asked, “With apple juice?”

Bruce said, “Yeah, with apple juice.” The worker smiled. He pulled an Old Milwaukee out of his backpack and filled his bottle.

“Is anyone collecting?” asked Bruce.

“I’ll take it,” said Wolf. Bruce threw him the empty can. Wolf crushed it and threw it in Shaggy’s cart.

Hippo said, “Andre has gone over to Debbie’s. He asked me if I wanted to go. I thought about it and said, ‘No, I think I’ll just stay here.’ I really don’t like Debbie.”

It started to rain, and it was time for me to go back to work, so I said my good byes. I said, “I’ll see you tomorrow.”

Then, at the park bench, I said good-bye to Serge and William.

“See you tomorrow, Dennis,” they said.

…

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Grumpy Juice

.

.

21 August 2012

Joy was in her usual spot this morning. The weather was cool with the threat of rain. Joy asked, “Is that the girlfriend of Alphonse, in the next block?”

“Yes, it’s Magdalene. I spoke to her last week after she lost her baby. Later in the week I talked to Ambrose. He said it was a ‘crack baby’ induced prematurely. He had a hole in his heart and his lungs weren’t able to supply oxygen to his other organs.”

“I’m sorry,” said Joy, “but she should be charged. Every kid I’ve brought into this world has been clean. I quit crack, cigarettes and alcohol while I was pregnant. That way, they at least had a fighting chance in the world. The night before my oldest was born, I smoked a joint. It showed up in the baby’s blood tests. They were ready to take him away from me. I said, “You’re going to take my baby away, because I smoked one joint? Over my dead body!

“My sister had a ‘crack baby’. You couldn’t even look at him or he would spaz out. Can you imagine what kind of  life is in store for that kid?

“Alphonse is on the skids with a lot of people right now. He and Magdalene have been sleeping in the hut with  Andre, Hippo,  Little Jake, Weasel and his dog Bear. Bear sleeps by the door, as a guard. Everyone knows that you have to be careful opening the door because Bear is behind it. Ambrose came by one night falling down drunk and just pushed in the door. It scraped Bear’s paw and she had to get five stitches. Nobody’s seen Alphonse since. Bear is still limping and has to have special ointment put on her paw twice a day.

“I just love Bear, she’s really a sweet dog, but has horrible breath. Weasel said to me, ‘I feed her Dentabone.’ I said, ‘That’s for removing plaque and tartar from her teeth. For her breath you have to give her Doggie Mints. If those don’t work she should be taken to a vet. That probably won’t happen, because all Weasel’s money goes on crack. I gave Doggie Mints to my dog, Roxie; she was a boxer and had great breath. She used to sleep with me every night. I didn’t even mind if she put her paw on my face when she slept. I couldn’t tolerate that with any of the men I’ve lived with.

“Like me, she was epileptic. If I had a seizure, she’d pat my face until I came out of it. I’d do the same for her. One time she had a prolonged, grand mal seizure and died before I could get her to the vet.”

I said, “I saw Bearded Bruce last Thursday. He and Inuq have applied for housing.”

“Yeah, I met them at Chuck’s new place. They were staying there. Maybe I should have held out at Chuck’s a while longer. His new place is a huge two bedroom. I don’t know about Inuq. She and Bruce have been together three years now, but while he was in prison she was living with other guys. I met her one day with her oldest son. He isn’t of legal drinking age, but he was staggering drunk.”

I said, “Bruce and Inuq are each getting their own apartments. That way Bruce said, ‘When we get into a fight we’ll each have our own place to go home to.”

Joy said, “I don’t know what’s happening with Fran. They’ve called her into court about three times. She’s so afraid of Gene, she doesn’t even want him to see her. It was just January that he got out of prison for beating her the last time. He was in a holding cell with my Jake, before they moved him to Millhaven.”

Chester stopped by to say hello. To Joy he said, “I didn’t hear you leave this morning.”

“If I’d stopped to make the bed, you probably would have heard me. Is there anything you want me to bring home?”

“I wouldn’t mind some pot. Do you know where I could get some?”

“You could try the Mission. I could give you some phone numbers, but I don’t know if anyone is coming downtown this afternoon. I saved some roaches. You might be able to get one joint with what’s in the can on the kitchen table.

“Chester, I want to use your phone later. I want to make an appointment with the Elizabeth Fry Society.

To me she said, “I’ve been thinking of looking into some kind of employment. I couldn’t do nine to five, but I’d like landscaping, maybe with flexible hours — of course, I’d want to be paid under the table… I’m good at growing flowers and plants. A neighbor, one time, had a couple of rose bushes that never bloomed. He was going to dig them up and toss them out. I said, ‘Let me try to do something with them. I dug them up, replanted them somewhere else, and within a couple of months they had pink and white blooms on them.

…

Noon in the park was quiet. Weasel was asleep with Bear under a tree. Andre was drunk, professing his love for Joy. “We could make such a great team,” he said to her.

“Yeah, sure we would,” said Joy.

Weasel awoke and asked, “What time is it?”

Bearded Bruce said, “It’s only twelve ten. Go back to sleep for another hour.” Later Weasel said, “I don’t remember coming here.”

Bruce said, “We started out up the hill. Then we came down here.”

“Weasel,” said Joy, “you missed a great fight. That big native guy and Andre were scrapping. He pushed Andre down on his ass. Andre got into that karate stance he uses, but he was so drunk that he couldn’t keep his balance. I kept egging him on saying, ‘You shouldn’t let him get away with that.’ Andre took a swing, missed, and the big guy pushed him on his ass again. The cops were strolling through the park and didn’t do a thing. I was sure someone would get a ticket.”

Weasel walked over to Hippo. I overheard him say, “If you even try to get up, I’ll knock you back down.” He then walked down the line to Bruce who said, “Well, didn’t we wake up with a gut full of grumpy juice?”

“What?” said Weasel, “Can I have a cigarette?”

“Of course you can,” said Bruce.

I asked Bruce, “How are the arrangements coming for housing?”

“Monday, I got my first Welfare check for $300. I’m waiting for my program (Ontario Disability Support Program) to kick in. Nothing can happen until that’s in place. Then we’ll sign the papers for housing. Hopefully, we’ll have a place in September.”

William came by with a two-wheeled cart. “I got this from a bar that was being refitted. One wheel was off the cart, but I took it to the Shepherd’s and a guy helped me to get the wheel back on. We inflated the tires and it’s good as new. The bar was throwing out a mini freezer, a fridge, all sorts of stuff. I saw some empty beer bottles in the garage and asked if I could have them. They gave me six cases of two fours, so I got $14.40 for those.

“Hippo, don’t throw that wine bottle away. I’ll take it.”

“Come get it yourself.” William rooted through the garbage container for the wine bottle and also pulled out a large paper coffee cup with a plastic lid.

Joy said to me, “I hate it when he does that.”

“William,” said Joy, “you’re not going to drink out of that are you?”

“It’ll be fine. I’ll swish a little beer in it first, to clean it out. I forgot my cup at home.” He pulled out a can of beer and filled the paper cup, so it looked like he was drinking coffee.

He said to me, “Would you like to know what I did with the Tim Horton’s card you gave me? I didn’t sell it to buy beer. I bought two coffee, a bagel with cream cheese — did you know that Tim Horton’s ran out of meat? I was in there at 10.00 pm, they close at 11:00, they didn’t have any meat. I went in the next day, a bit earlier. I still had about $1.50 on the card, and got some kind of meat wrap. I made good use of the card.

“I met a woman in the park once. I was sitting on a bench, shaved, dapper looking. We started talking. It turned out that we had both previously lived in Montreal. We talked about that for a while. She said, ‘You’re a very interesting man.’

“I was straight forward with her. I said, ‘I left my wife because she had been cheating on me. I lost my job, my unemployment insurance ran out and now I’m homeless.’ She said, ‘I left my husband because he had been cheating on me.’ She was a beautiful woman, had lots of money, ran her own business. She said, ‘I have some errands to run. Will you wait for me here, for about twenty minutes?’ I said, ‘I won’t wait right here. I was planning to go to the liquor store to buy a couple of bottles of beer, but that will only take about fifteen minutes, so I’ll be here before you get back.’ She said, ‘Can I give you money to buy a six-pack? Then we can share a few beer.’ I said, ‘You don’t have to give me any money. I’ve got a cheque on me for $547.00. I’ll buy a six pack.’ She said, ‘You’re so generous.’ When I got back with the beer she had two huge bags with her. She said, ‘I’ve bought you a gift.’ There were clothes in there, chips, chocolate bars. She even bought me a return ticket to Toronto and back. She said, ‘If things don’t work out for you in Ottawa, come visit me in Toronto. The tickets are good for a year.’ She gave me her address and phone number. I said I’d call her.

“My apartment was robbed. They took my back-pack with the address and phone number in it. She’d told me where she lived, but I couldn’t remember. I couldn’t even remember her last name, so I couldn’t look her up in the phone book. That’s the way it goes. Perhaps, we’ll run into each other some other time.”

…

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