Posts Tagged ‘kindness’

1 June 2012

Labatt Logo

Labatt Logo (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

The weather today was uncertain; It was overcast, but not quite raining. At the park were ten of the usuals and one dog.

“Hi Hippo, How have you been?” I shook his broken hand very gently.

“My head hurts.”

“How is your hand?”

“It hurts too. Jake and I slept at ‘the heater’ last night — not together, just in the same place. The streets aren’t safe anymore.”

“Hi Jake, How are you?”

“I’m drunk. Hippo and I started early.”

“I guess that’s a good thing.”

Shakes was sitting on the lawn and was having trouble getting up. “I’ll use this wine bottle and this container as a crutch to help me up.” He made it half way then tumbled over. Jacques stood up and took Shakes’ arm to help him to his feet. “Did you know that Rocky got jumped last night. It was the same guys that jumped me. He’s in about the same shape as I am.”

“Do you know why they jumped Rocky?”

“Because they’re assholes.”

“Hi Donald, how are you?”

“I have my methadone treatment at one o’clock. Everybody hates me. I don’t know why. They make fun of me.”

“I’ve never heard anybody say anything against you.”

“I appreciate you being my friend.”

“Hi Shark, how is Irene feeling today?”

“She’s with Anastasia. They’re drunk to the tits. They bought a case of Labatt Maximum Ice. It’s 7.1 % alcohol. I bought myself a 26 ounce bottle of watermellon vodka. It’s 37% alcohol. I thought I should get something to catch up. You don’t need any mix with it. Have a swig.”

“That’s smooth. I’ve never tasted that before.”

“I had to kick Irene out at eleven o’clock last night. She was drunk. When she gets like that her mind goes on retard. She’ll have about five conversations going and she keeps repeating them. I guess she forgets that she’s said the same thing five minutes before.

“We’re planning to get an apartment together, the problem is she wants to go through the Salvation Army. I want to get something through my landlord. He has a bunch of buildings. If we get these workers involved, one group doesn’t talk the same language as the other group. I’ve been in the Welfare system for twenty years. I know what to say to them, so they’ll understand it, and I’ll get what I want.

“Maybe it would be better if Irene and Joy got an apartment together. The only problem is that Irene drinks more than Joy. Joy has her drinking fairly well under control.

“Anastasia wants us to go with her to her mother’s house near Goderich. It’s on Georgian Bay, so there would be boating, swimming, fishing. The water isn’t very deep but you can still catch bass. The only problem is Anastasia is a bit nuts. You must have noticed that yesterday.

“I have to be back every week to see my doctor and pick up my meds.”

“How old is Anastasia, and how old is her mother?”

“I guess Anastasia is about 61, her mother is in her 90’s.

“The problem would be getting back. I guess we could arrange something with the bus. It’s a long trip. Something to keep in mind though.”

Chester and Outcast were going over Chester’s bank statement. Outcast said, “We were playing cards last night and then I left. What’s the last thing you remember buying.”

“I bought beer at the Beer Store.”

“Okay, that’s listed here. Then, there’s a purchase in Gatineau. Did you go to Gatineau?”

“No.”

“There’s also a purchase at an Exxon gas station. You don’t drive a car, so that’s not you. There are withdrawals of $200., $300. These are since you lost your card. Do you remember giving your card to anyone?”

“No.”

Silver said, “Look at Donald, he’s never going to make his methadone appointment. I’ve been drinking since 4:30 this morning and I can stagger straighter than that. I get up at 4:30, have a shower — yes, I drink beer in the shower. It’s okay as long as I don’t fall and hurt myself.”

“Hello Wolf” I said.

“Have a look at my dog.”

“Is that a different dog? That doesn’t look like Shaggy.”

“That’s Shaggy, they clipped her, did all kinds of stuff to her. I brought her blanket and her bed so she’ll get acclimatized. Is she breathing?”

“Yes, I can see her chest going up and down.”

“I was just joking. I guess I haven’t known you that long. You haven’t seen Shaggy when she’s been clipped? I have her done once a year.”

“No, I only met you in January, so it’s been about five months.”

Donald didn’t make his methadone treatment. He was too drunk to walk. Even if he had made it there, they wouldn’t have taken him in his condition. The adventures will continue tomorrow; same time, same place.

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30 May 2012

This morning I was happy to see Hippo, he had stopped to talk to Silver at his usual spot. Hippo had a bandage on his forehead.

“Hi Hippo. What happened?”

“I got into a little scuffle.”

Hippo was having problems obtaining a copy of his birth certificate, because he is adopted. I downloaded the appropriate application form for ‘Post Adoption Birth Information’ from the internet. I also gave him forms to apply for a Social Insurance card and an Ontario Health card. I offered to help him to fill in the blanks and to mail them. He was happy to receive the information.

Silver had a plastic box for me to sit on as we chatted. He said ‘After we left the park yesterday Hippo and I went to my place at the Lafayette, had a few beer and ordered pizza. The rest of the time we spent watching television. They have live music every Tuesday and Wednesday night. ‘Lucky Ron’ has a regular gig there. When I hear a good song being played, I turn the television down to listen. It’s a great place to live. I get along great with the landlord. I’ve been there about four years now. It’s now the oldest hotel in Ottawa, they’ve torn all the others down.”

“From classy tavern and hotel to restaurant, pub, dive and everything in between, Lafayette first opened its doors in 1849 and although it’s never closed since, this Ottawa establishment has gone through many changes. The current inception is The Laff: a comfortable pub and tavern in the heart of Ottawa’s Byward Market.

Your server will gladly take your order and bring your sub back to your table for you. Wood floors, tables and chairs that are scuffed and worn; and a long vinyl bench along one wall provides a little extra padding for the delicate customer. There are live bands every Tuesday and Wednesday night as well. In the absence of live entertainment, the tavern has a huge jukebox in the back so you can hear your favourite song as often as you like.”

“I’ve had jobs near by at the market, in some of the flower stalls. They open at 5:30 am and close at 5:30 pm. I’ve also worked on construction and at a fruit and vegetable store. My shift there was from 11:00 pm to 7:00 am. I’d have to count everything coming in, then sort it for the various clients it would be delivered to. Toothless Chester got me that job.

“Joy invited me to a barbecue at their place Saturday, but Chuck still owes me $20.00. I didn’t want to go there and get paid off with a few hot dogs or hamburgers. I want my money. Joy was pissed off. She was ready to take a swing at me. I’d never hit a woman, but I’d get one of my ‘street sisters’ to. I guess I can kiss that money good-bye.

“Joy went off with Chester yesterday. I hope she doesn’t rip him off for money the way Sara did.”

“Joy was upset with the way Sara treated Chester. As far as I know, she’s always paid her way, and more, with Toothless Chuck and with the other Chuck before.

At noon, on my way to the park, I met Irving and Hippo. I asked Irving how he was making out. “I’m still on the streets, still sleeping in the ATM kiosk of a bank. Last Wednesday, Shakess woke me up there and asked me if I wanted a drink. I said, ‘Sure!’. He slept there that night as well. There is a new lady manager who kicks Sabrina in the foot to wake her up. I don’t like that. Does she treat her customers like that? I don’t think so. The other lady manager would sometimes bring me coffee. She’d say, ‘Okay Irving, time to get up.’ I’d say, ‘Okay, just let me get my eyes open. I’ll clean up my butts, then I’ll be gone.’

“I’ve been having trouble with my back from the time the cops threw me down the concrete steps of the church. Just the other day, I climbed over a wall and jumped to the other side. When I landed I could feel something crunching in my back. I went to the hospital, to get an x-ray and to have my eyes checked. They said I need glasses, but they wouldn’t do the x-ray. I had my health card and my status card. I don’t know why they wouldn’t check my back.

“I’m going to see the doctor that was in charge of my alcohol recovery program. I’m sure he can give me a prescription for an x-ray.”

I left Irving and Sabrina and proceeded to the park where I met Andre, Little Jake, Chester, Hippo, Rocky, Joy, Toothless Chuck and his dog V.

I was especially glad to see Andre, who I haven’t seen for several weeks. I asked, “How have you been, Andre?”

“I’ve been in hospital. I kept getting acid reflux. Bile would come up and burn my esophagus. I felt a lump in my throat. It became infected and then I had trouble breathing. I went to the Sally and by that time I could barely breathe. I could breathe in, but not out. They rushed me to the hospital. I was worried that it might be a tumor, because my dad had tumors. I’m on antibiotics now. I may have to have my tonsils out. There are a lot of things they want to do to me, but I don’t want an operation.

“I’ve had problems with my lungs since a guy stabbed me in the side at a party. I held a towel against the wound and fell asleep. When I awoke, I yelled for someone to help me. One of my friends from the party heard me. He said, ‘Party’s over, Andre, time to go home.’ I said, ‘Man, I need to get to the hospital.’ He said, ‘No problem. You want to go right now, or can we smoke a joint first?’ I said, ‘I’ve been like this since last night, so waiting a little longer isn’t going to make a difference.’ When I inhaled the joint, smoke came out of my side. I figured then that I better get to the hospital right away. At the hospital they told me that my lung was collapsed. Now, I only have partial use of it. I’m prone to getting pneumonia — too many nights sleeping outside in the rain. Apart from that, I’m the same fun-loving guy I always was.”

I said, “We’ll have to go panning together again. That was a blast!”

“On Easter I panned in front of the Cathedral. They had two masses. I panned through both of them. My buddy and me made $44.00. After that, I said, ‘That’s it. No more panning today.’ ”

I sat next to Joy and scratched V’s neck. She rolled over and let me scratch her belly. Joy petted and Z bit her arm. “I don’t like that dog,” she said.

“Chuck has invited Steve and Coreen over for a barbecue. He wants to buy steak. I told him, ‘I can’t afford to feed these people. Let’s save the steak until it’s just me and you. We’ll have a nice meal, some baked potatoes.’

“I’ve paid all my bills, paid the debt I owed to Jacques, now I’m free and clear. I’ll do my little dance now. Later, I think I’m going to shop for something nice for myself, maybe a ring. I got this gold nose ring last week. Do you like it?”

“It looks great, Joy.”

“How about some macaroni salad?” asked Chuck.

“Fine,” said Joy, “buy anything you like. I’m not cooking it.” To me she said, “I may not even come home that day.”

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21 June 2013

Joy was all smiles this morning. She was seated on her box, but any minute I expected her to break into dance.

“How did it go with getting your furniture?”

“Great, The place is huge. I got a new sofa, a shelf that will go on one of the tables I have. I took the legs off my bed because of the seizure I had, but I wanted to get a wicker headboard that I saw there. I didn’t get it. I also wanted a silver frame in the shape of three hearts. I didn’t get that either. My worker was so impatient. I wanted to look around to make sure I got things I wanted to live with, but she kept checking her watch. I think we were only there half an hour.

“When I got home and we got everything set up I did a little dance. I’ve waited seven months for this stuff, now I’m going to enjoy it.

“I haven’t seen many of the guys lately, not even dickhead.”

I asked, “Who would dickhead be?”

“Jake, he’s been over a couple of times. He wanted me to push him from the Salvation Army to the park. I said, “No way!”

“Has he apologized for beating you?”

“Yeah he has, he was even crying. He said, ‘Joy, I’ll never hurt you again. I’ve learned my lesson. I don’t want to go to prison again.’ I said, ‘Yeah, I bet you learned a lot in prison. I don’t want to hear about it. Instead of being sorry now, you should have thought before you broke my ribs, especially since you’d broken them just two weeks before.

“‘You’re whining like Antonio.’ He asked, ‘Who’s Antonio? Is that someone you’ve had living over here? I said. ‘No, you dumbass, it’s Mariah’s boyfriend! She kicked him out six months ago. For the last twenty-two months I’ve enjoyed living by myself and sleeping by myself. Jake said, ‘I could help you with that.’ I said, ‘For now just consider us friends. We’ll see how it goes.”

I said, “You mentioned that he had to have a piss test as a requirement of his parole. How did that go?”

“It was funny. There was a new parole officer there, who didn’t know Jake’s, medical history. After the test he came back and said, ‘You’re in trouble, Jake. The test came back positive.’ Jake said, ‘Positive for morphine, right?’ The guy says, ‘Yeah.’ Jake pulls out of his pocket a piece of paper and waves it at the guy. ‘Prescription!’ he says.

“His regular parole officer is a really hard case. He can pounce on Jake anytime  and have him tested. If Jake has any advanced warning, all he has to do is drink a cup of vinegar. That’ll get any trace of drugs or booze out of his system. My brother was in prison. He had the same booze and drug prohibition on his parole. He used to carry a bottle of vinegar with him all the time.

“What time is it now?”

“Eight thirty.”

“That means I’ve been here two and a half hours. I even made sure I got the early bus. So far, I’ve made four dollars and twenty-six cents.”

I said, “On Wednesday, two cruisers pulled up on the sidewalk. The male cop demanded that Debbie give them her last beer. She was pissed off and shoved it into his chest. She was handcuffed and thrown into the back of the cruiser.”

“Was she arrested?”

“No, they let her go with just a ticket.”

“That’s assault, and she’s been in and out of jail a dozen times. If that had been me, I would have gone straight to prison.

“I’ve got no use for that stupid, loud-mouthed bitch. When we were up at the bridge one time she was going on and on about something. I was ready to throw her off the side. I had her back to the railing. She was whimpering, ‘Please, Joy, please don’t push me over.’ Sometimes I think I should have.”

“Maryjane just got out of jail.”

“Yeah, that was because she had three no shows at court. She’s been charged with assault. There again, if that was me I’d be in prison.”

 
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I sat on the sidewalk beside Shakes and in front o f Debbie, Little Jake and Joy. Wolf had gone for a piss. I gave a used copy of the book “Women Who Run With the Wolves to Joy. It seemed appropriate since she was wearing a sweatshirt with a wolf on the front.”

She thanked me and said, “Sorry I have to run, but I have an appointment with my landlady to fix my toilet.”

I pulled out another book, Mob Rule, that I intended to give to Wolf. Matches looked at it and asked, “Are you going to give this to Wolf?”

I said, “Yes.”

He said, “I like to read too, you know, especially since I don’t have television.”

I said, “You take it then, Shakes.”

Shortly after Wolf returned. He saw the book Shakes was holding. “That looks interesting. Mind if I read that after you’re finished?’ ‘Sure,’ said Matches.

I said, “It’s about Paul Volpe, the boss of the Toronto Mafia from the early-1960’s up to his death in 1983. It mentions his bootlegging days as a young man, to his initiation into the Mob, his stints in jail, and then the details of his death. Maybe you’ll recognize some of the names.”

Jake said, “We don’t remember names, we remember faces.”

I said, “There are pictures, too.”

Wolf reached into Shaggy’s cart and pulled out three books. One was by Danielle Steele, “We all know what this one’s about. This one’s by Catherine Cookson, I don’t know her. This last one is a murder mystery. Doesn’t look like there’s much shooting, but it’s more my style. Anyway, I got lots to read for the weekend. I’m going to Tim Horton’s, have a coffee, a couple of donuts and read my books.”

Debbie asked, “Dennis, how do you like my new summer haircut?”

“It looks very nice. It suits you.”

“Jake cut it. We were both stoned, but it came out alright, didn’t it.?”

I said, “It looks professional. Nobody would ever know that it wasn’t done at a salon.”

Jake said, “Yeah, it’s a lot better than the haircut that Jacques gave me.”

Wolf, whose white hair is almost to his shoulders said, “There’s no way that any of you guys are going to cut my hair.”

Shakes asked me, “Dennis, are you going to the Rib Fest?”

“No, ” I said, “are you?”

“I’ve been two times already and I’m going again tonight. I should do pretty well I always go to the Blues Fest, the Jazz Fest and the Folk Fest. My favorite is the Blues Fest. I can’t get past the gate, but people always give me booze and get me stoned.”

Shakes was wearing a pair of shorts. Debbie asked, “What’s that scar on your leg?

“Which one?”

“The one that runs from your knee to your hip?”

“That’s where I got shot. The bullet went in here,” pointing to a circular scar, “it broke my femur and came out here.” He lifted his leg to show the scar from the exit wound.They had to cut me open to put the rod in.

“I didn’t mean to be nosey,” said Debbie, “I was just wondering.”

“I got it at a house party. I knew there was going to be trouble so I went to my street sister and asked for my nine millimeter. She didn’t wasn’t to give it to me. She said, ‘If I give you this gun, you’re going to get into trouble. I just know it.’ I said, ‘That’s why I need my gun.’ I was at the party, there was lots of booze, drugs, but I decided to leave. My bro asked for my gun. I took it out of my pocket, took the clip out, but forgot there was still a shell in the chamber. It had a hair-trigger, much too sensitive. When my bro took my gun, he accidentally shot me in the leg.

I asked, “Why did your friend want your gun?”

“‘Cause he wanted to shoot the guy.

“The last time I was in prison was in 1995. I was in Collins Bay for nearly five years.”

I asked, “What were you in for?”

“Bank robbery. I was just seventeen, selling drugs, robbing banks, boxing. That’s when I was sparring with George Chuvallo and Shawn O’Sullivan. I still got it.”

I said, “I guess it’s just like riding a bicycle. You never forget it.”

“I don’t get into fights any more, but if I’m backed against a wall, watch out, the fists are going to fly.”

 

 

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The_Mammoth_Hunters_cover

20 June 2013

The park was empty today except for Little Jake and Debbie.  “Are you going for beer?” Jake asked Debbie.

“Yeah, I’m going. I’ll leave my jacket here.”

Jake commented, “You’re going the wrong way.”

“I can’t go to that liquor store, they won’t let me in. I have  to go to the mall. Is there anything else you want?”

“No, just beer.

“I don’t know where everybody is today. Wolf and Shaggy were here this morning, but Wolf got too drunk. He had to go home. I think they got scared by the cops.  After you left yesterday two cruisers pulled right up on the sidewalk.”

Debbie said, “Yeah, they had me in handcuffs. This cop wanted my last beer, so I shoved it in his chest. That’s when they grabbed me and put me in the back of  the cruiser.”

“Did they let you go?” I asked.

“Yeah, after a while they gave me a ticket and let me go.”

Jake said, “They were going through our bags and everything. They aren’t allowed to do that —  are they? I said, “Get the fuck out of my bag. You got no business going through my things like that.” I get mouthy when I’m pissed off.  That’s just me.  I walked away after that. A cop chased me. He gave me a ticket. This is going to be a bad summer, man. They’re really down on us.”

An attractive woman, looking slightly lost, came over to us and asked, “Do you know what time it is?”

“Yeah, it’s 12:20.”

“Oh, thanks.” She started to walk away, Frank asked, “Can you spare some change?”

“No, sorry.”

“Well be that way, then.” To me Frank asked, “What time did you say it was?”

“12:20.”

“Are you serious? I thought it was about five o’clock. What day is it?”

“The twentieth, summer starts tomorrow.”

“No, I meant the day of the week. Is it Wednesday or Thursday?

“Thursday.”

“I wonder why nobody’s around. Maybe there’s something going on that I don’t know about.

“I’m glad that Deaf Donald isn’t around today. I can only take him in small doses. I guess that because he’s deaf  he doesn’t realize how fucking loud he is. His trick is to ask people for money so he can replace the batteries in his hearing aid. One time the cops came up to me and said they’d had complaints about somebody yelling. It was a couple of the regular guys. I said, ‘You guys know me. I don’t yell.’ After they left, I heard Donald, down the stairs in the park. Then I figured it out. He was cutting my grass.”

“So how are you doing today?”

“I made sixteen dollars,  so far, but  I spent some of it.”

“Did you ever get your furniture?”

“No, I was talking to my worker yesterday. You saw her. She’s always good to me, but still no furniture. I got a bed a table and a TV that doesn’t work. I got a radio and one lamp. The only thing for me to do is read. Bearded Bruce lent me a book, it’s part of a series of six. It’s called The Clan of the Cave Bear. He said I had to start with that one, but I’ve already read The Mammoth Hunters. It’s the third book, so I already know what’s going to happen. Now, I’m reading what went before.

“It takes place about thirty-five thousand years ago. There’s this five-year-old girl, Ayla, who gets lost because of an earthquake. She comes across another tribe called the Clan of the Cave Bear. The medicine woman feels sorry for her and takes care of her. When the clan gets a new leader he throws her out — she’s considered one of the ‘Others’, the tall ones who have blond hair and blue eyes.

“She changes the course of history. The Clan of the Cave Bear hunted horses for food, but Ayla traps a foal, raises it and learns to ride him. She befriends  a wolf and a saber-toothed tiger. Ayla  also discovers how to make fire. That’s as far as I’ve got,  so far…

“I got to tell you —  I always tell the truth; that’s something my mother taught me…”

I said, “I’m the same way. I don’t have a good enough memory to lie. I’d never remember what I said the time before.  When Joy got busted for jumping the bus, they wanted her name. She asked, “What name did I give last time?”

“Anyway,  I went to Metro last night and stole two pork chops. I took them over to Bruce’s place, cooked them with lemon  juice,  garlic, oregano and pepper. They were delicious.  Sometimes Bruce and I try to outdo each other with our cooking… I’m a good cook. I grew up in a restaurant… I got to be maitre d at a five-star hotel.   We served Austrian and Canadian food… I wore a tux and everything.

“For some reason I ended up at Steve’s place with half a bucket of ribs. I think some girl gave them to us.

“You heard that Shakes got robbed, eh? Yeah, he passed out… They took his pack, his three grams, his bottle, his change and his hat. Anybody who knows him would recognize that hat… I think I know who did it. His name is right on the tip of my tongue… What is it?… I hate when this happens… Anyway, the guy just got out of jail.”

I asked, “Would I know him?”

“No, he did about two years for something… I can’t remember… It’ll come to me…”

 

 

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feller   Caterpillar Feller Buncher

19 June 2013

It was crowded in the park and tempers were short.  Alphonse yelled, “Dennis, aren’t you going to say hello to us?”

I replied, “I’m working my way in that direction, just be patient.”  I made my rounds, shaking hands, asking how people were feeling, what had happened since Id seen them last.”

I came to Alphonse and Magdalene. I said, “I hear that you have a new apartment now. How do you like it?” Alphonse said, “We like it there. It’s far from downtown, but it’s nice. Dennis, I’d like you to meet my friend Manisee.”

We shook hands. He said, “Do you want to know an easy way to remember my name. Just think of Man I See, Manisee.”

“I’ll remember that, Manisee.” I sat down near Little Jake, Wolf and Jacques. “I see you have a new hat, Jacques. It looks good on you.”

“Thank you. It keeps the sun off.”

“How are you doing, Jake?”

“Not so good. Those people over They’re drinking straight vodka. They’re getting too loud, especially Magdalene. Her screeching in my ear is driving me nuts. I’m about ready to swat her.”

Alphonse yelled over, “Jake, what’s that boo-boo on your lip? It looks pretty bad.”

“It’s just a cold sore. I’ve been smoking too many butts.” To me he whispered, “See what I mean.”

Wolf said, “I woke up here at six thirty yesterday evening. Shakes woke me up. It took about two hours to walk home pushing Shaggy’s cart. When I got to my apartment building I saw Outcast and some others sitting on the curb so I gave them my drunk talk. I didn’t have my teeth, in so I don’t know if I made any sense.

“After I got unpacked I was ravenously hungry. I didn’t trust myself to use the stove, so I went to Subway. I gave the guy my card and he said, ‘I know just what you want. I gonna make you something special.’ He did. I don’t know how he knew what I wanted, I didn’t know what I wanted, but he did good. It was really delicious. I still got half in the fridge.

“Yesterday I wanted to tell you about the new book I got. I was too drunk last night to do any reading. I didn’t even crack it open. I don’t even remember the title. I guess I must have read the back cover, but I don’t know. I don’t remember very much, just little bits and pieces, of last night.

“Jake, have you got a dollar twenty-five?”

“Sure,”

“If I give you ten bucks will you do a run for me and get a case of beer? I don’t want to move. I’ll give you one.”

“Will you give me two?”

“Sure, Jake. You look like you could use them.”

Wolf said to me, “I can see that Jake is getting grumpy. That’s why I don’t mind giving him two beer.”

Magdalene sat next to Wolf and put her hand on his shoulder. He said, “Hey, watch the fingerprints!”

“I just wanted to say hello.”

“Saying hello is one thing; touching is another. Just keep your hands off me.”

Someone in white pants and a white jacket came along and called to Magdalene. She went over to talk to him. He said, “You ran out on me yesterday. I gave you money to buy a bottle of vodka and you never came back.”

“Yeah, I got delayed. I was talking to someone. See, I just got out of jail and this person was looking after my stuff. I was worried about my stuff, but don’t worry I’ll pay you back for the vodka as soon as I get some money.”

“Alphonse entered the conversation, “You don’t have to worry about your money, my friend. We’re good for it. Just give us a few days. You’ll see us around.”

I asked Hippo, “Have you gone to court yet?”

“Yeah, they remanded it to sometime in July. I was told that they’re going to drop the charges. I have to go back to be fingerprinted.”

“Don’t they have your fingerprints?”

“No, I guess I was too intoxicated. I’m not allowed to drink, smoke pot or carry any weapons, especially hammers. If I get caught it’s straight to jail. I don’t mind, it’s just until my court date.”

I asked, “Have you been home to see your family lately?”

“My mom came by yesterday, bought me some groceries, gave me some money. She’s going down to Kitchener this weekend to visit her brother, my aunt, my nephews, my nieces.”

“Do you ever get down there to visit your relatives?”

“No, I don’t get along with her brothers.

“Jerry here just got back from B.C. where I’d eventually like to go. He operates a feller buncher.”

feller buncher is a type of harvester used in logging. It is a motorized vehicle with an attachment that can rapidly cut and gather several trees before felling them.standard heavy equipment base with a tree-grabbing device furnished with a chain-saw, circular saw or a shear – a pinching device designed to cut small trees off at the base. The machine then places the cut tree on a stack suitable for a skidderor forwarder, or other means of transport (yarding) for further processing (e.g., delimbing, bucking, loading, or chipping).

Jerry said, Hippo, you could operate one of those. It’s no more complicated than the skidders you’ve operated. I was working at a dry camp. The only liquor was what you brought in, otherwise nothing. After two months I came into a bar in the city and was mixing, vodka, whiskey, rum; anything I could get my hands on. The waitress said to me, ‘Man, it looks like you haven’t had alcohol for months.’ I said, ‘That’s exactly it.'”

 

 

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panhandlers-topper

18 June 2013

As I was approaching the park, Danny came running to meet me. “Dennis, I hate to ask, but could you spare me some bus tickets? Yesterday, Shakes jumped the bus and I was left walking, but it turned out for the best. I ran into a lady I know and she wants to buy two of my paintings. She offered to drive me to where I was going to visit a friend, so that worked out. When I got to my friend’s place, he wasn’t home, so I ended up walking the rest of the way.”

“How long did it take you to walk home?”

“About three hours, but I didn’t mind walking. I’m a fast walker. I’ve got a painting that I’m working on. I’ll bring it out” The image, outlined with a wood burning tool, was of an eagle in flight. “See the way its wings are up and his claws extended. He’s swooping. I’m going to put a rabbit over to the side here.  He won’t have caught the rabbit, but he will. That’s the way they hunt; they swoop and grab.”

Shakess said, “The same thing happened to me a few days ago. The bus driver wouldn’t let me on the bus because I didn’t have the full fare. I walked to the mall and tried a few different buses.  I told the driver, ‘Look, I’ve only got $1.63 and I’ve got no other way to get home.’ Luckily one of them let me ride. I started at 5:30 and didn’t get home until 10:30.”

I sat near Joy. She was going through her purse, then called Chester over. “Have you got any money?” Chester checked his pockets and said, “I’ve got $3.60.” Joy said, “That will just make it. Hippo, can you make a run for me?”

“Sure!”

Joy waved the money at him. He indicated that she should bring it to him. Finally, he came over to get it.  Joy said, “Look, if  it’s too much trouble, I can try to get in there myself.”

“No, it’s okay.”

“You say it’s okay, but you’re not moving.”

Hippo said, “What? You want me to run there? I can run.”

Gaston said, “Yes, show us the Hippo trot.”

Hippo said, “If you think I’m fat. Look at the guy coming down the sidewalk.”

Joy said, “It’s not his fault. He doesn’t eat much. It’s some kind of eating disorder.”

Gaston said, “Yes, it’s glandular.”

Hippo headed toward the liquor store. Joy said, “I swear, when he brings that bottle back I’m going home, alone. He’s been over four times in the last week. Sunday he came over at 4:30. I was already in my boxers, ready to settle in and watch TV. I was cooking supper and I’d only cooked enough for myself.  I hate eating when there is somebody looking at me, drooling, so I told him to help himself. That didn’t leave very much for me. I told him, “Look man, don’t come over at such weird hours.’  The next morning he came over at 10:30. I was just sweeping up. I said, ‘I really don’t want company now. I’ve got things to do.’

“I have a hard time affording food for myself,  let alone feeding someone else. He has his mommy to put money in his bank account, but I never see him then; only when he wants something.

“If  I weren’t waiting for Hippo, I’d be outa here. The cops are sure to come, especially with so many people and Frank being as loud as he is. Bearded Bruce came by earlier with  bottles of vodka, sherry and some kind of dark beer in a green can. He mixed them all together and called it a brucinator. Frank had most of it and you know how obnoxious he gets when he’s wasted.”

A cell phone started ringing. Jacques said, “That’s an incoming call! It shows that I’m important!” He spoke a few words then brought the phone to Joy, he said, “It’s Chili, for you.”

“Hi sweetie, how are you doing… What do you mean you’re a hop, skip and a jump from here… You’re at the mall?… Are you coming here?… If you are I’ll stick around, otherwise I’m leaving… I’ll see you tomorrow then… I better not see any smash marks on your arms and legs, or I’ll slap you silly. I’m also going to check between your toes… Okay, good-bye.  Stupid chick. There are three buildings there. She has her own apartment, but she has half the complex staying at her place. They’re all getting high.”

I asked, “Is she still in a wheelchair?”

“They’d put her in a walker, but she got fucked up again. She went to hospital and is back in a wheelchair.”

I asked, “What is the problem with her legs?”

“She doesn’t take care of herself. She’ll get a small cut, or damage an artery with a hypodermic needle. It’ll get infected, then she gets blood clots. If it’s not taken care of,  it causes death of tissue in the limb. It also affects the immune system.  The same thing happened to me. See this scar below my knee? It was a cut that got infected.  They gave me a powerful antibiotic and said, ‘If this doesn’t work, we’re going to have to amputate your leg.’ That’s the position she’s in.”

“We’re you on crack then?”

“No, just on booze.”

 

 

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panhandeling-women
 
18 June 2013

This morning after getting off the bus, greeting Metro, I noticed Joy’s feet sticking out from behind a pillar. I fished in my wallet for bus tickets,  Joy always  needs them, or else she’ll try to hop the bus from the back door.

I didn’t notice Chester approaching. He asked, “Are those for me?”

I declined, “No thanks, Chester, you hang on to them.”

When I approached Joy she was huddled over, her sweater pulled over her knees. “I’m definitely under dressed for this weather.”

“How have you been feeling?”

“Not so good, I’ve got a pain like something I swallowed didn’t go down right; but I get that pain if I swallow spit. It’s because of this cage I’ve got in my chest. It deems to be going away now. I’ve still been having dizzy spells, like I get before I’m going to have a seizure. It happened yesterday at home. I was watching television, then this wave of dizziness came over me. I looked around my apartment for my medication. I usually keep a stash somewhere, but couldn’t find it. I lay down on the bed. I  must have passed out because I woke up on the floor.

“The torn rotator cuff I have, has turned purple. I can’t lift my arm. Have a look at this.” She lifted her bandana to reveal a split in her eyebrow. “I took the legs off my bed, so next time I won’t have as far to fall.

“This afternoon I have an appointment with my women to see about furniture. I hope I don’t have to pay for delivery, because I’m strapped. These people are supposed to help people without money. They aren’t offering much help.”

I commented, “You moved into your apartment seven months ago? And you still don’t have furniture?”

“I moved in November ninth.”

“How has it been going with Jake? You mentioned that he would be coming over.”

“Yeah,  he was over on the weekend. I fixed him supper. He was over again last night. He’s really fat. He’s in a wheelchair and doesn’t know how to use it very well —  I used to be able to do wheelies in mine. He says he’s two hundred and thirty, but he’s way more than that. He’s really getting it at the Sally. Guys will just come up to him and give him a shot in the back of the head, or a one, two, three combination. I said to him, ‘Well, in the past, you shouldn’t have been such an asshole, to so many people.’

“He noticed the condoms in my drawer. He asked, ‘Who are these for?’ I said, ‘For you, if I ever decide to fuck you.’ There’s no way I’d let him do it without a condom. Who knows what diseases he’s carrying. He asked, ‘Have there been any other guys you’ve been with?’ I said, ‘No, I’ve been waiting for you.’ There’s no spark though. Nothing at all. He asked if he could come over today, but I said, ‘I’ve got an appointment with my women. I don’t know how long that’s going to take.’ He said, ‘Well, I can’t come Wednesday, because I’ve got my piss test.’ It seems crazy. He’s got a condition on his parole that he doesn’t drink, but they warn him before he’s tested. He has plenty of time to get it out of his system.”

I said, “You mentioned that he had been sober for a while.”

“All the time he’s been inside, but there’s the jailhouse hooch. Everybody drinks that. It’s easier to get drugs there than it is on the outside. He was drinking and smoking pot on the weekend.

“He’s acting really dependent, like I should be catering to him or something. When I told him it was time for him to go home he asked, ‘Will you push my chair to the bus stop?’ all whiny like. I said, ‘There’s a slight hill from here to the bus stop, you can make it there yourself. Maybe when I can afford to get a cell phone, you can phone me from the bottom of the hill and I’ll come and push you.’

Chester came back with only one coffee. He said, “They aren’t taking the coupons any more. They’d only give me one coffee.”

“Don’t worry about it, they’ll be having another roll up the rim to win soon. ” Joy showed me a clear plastic box with dozens of torn coffee rims. “A woman just dropped these in my hat. I guess she didn’t want to wait until the next promotion.”

 

 

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English: Ryan Hobson joins Michael Ignatieff f...

English: Ryan Hobson joins Michael Ignatieff for food bank photo op. (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

13 June 2013

At the park, I sat between Little Jake and Joy. I asked Joy, “How are you feeling today? Sick? Sore? Tired?”

“All of the above. Big Jake is coming over tonight.”

“How do you feel about that?”

“Okay, I guess. He came over Monday. He’s quit drinking. He’s in a wheelchair.”

“Did you beat  the shit out of him?”

“No, maybe that will come tonight.”

“He phoned this morning, on Jacques’ phone. He asked to come over. I said, ‘I’m cooking chicken, will that be alright?’ What a stupid cow. I shouldn’t be feeding him after what he did to me.”

“I hope it goes okay.”

“I hope so too. This morning I got on the bus, put in my ticket, walked to the back and sat down. The driver yelled, ‘Hey lady!’ I didn’t know who he was talking to. ‘You, lady with the blue back pack, would you come to the front please?’ I look to see what color my backpack is — blue. So I walk to the front. He asked, ‘What’s in the bottle that you’re drinking?’ I said, ‘It’s bubble tea with ginger ale. You know, bubble tea? Usually it’s made with tea and sparkling water, but I use ginger ale.’ He said, ‘Okay, you can sit down.’

Little Jake said, “Didn’t he ask to smell it? The cops always ask to smell my bottle.”

“No, bus drivers don’t do that. They wouldn’t want their nose anywhere near my bottle.”

“I’ll have to remember that one.”

Mariah  said, “I went to the Food Bank today. I could only get a few things. They allowed me three cans: one of vegetables, one stew and one tuna. They also gave me a tiny plastic container of margarine and a few other items.”

“What kind of stew did you get?” asked Joy, “Is it the one that tastes like dog food — Gravy Train?”

“Yeah, that’s the one.”

“I had to get there three hours before they opened, even then there was a line up. By the time I got in, there was hardly anything left.”

“Didn’t you get any meat or eggs?”

“When I had kids, they used to give me meat and eggs, but not as a single.”

Shakes asked, “Mariah, would you help me to get my groceries some day.”

“I can’t do it Friday, but maybe Saturday.”

“Saturday is fine. The doctor has me on a special diet.”

“Dennis, ” said Shakes, “you know me?”

‘Yes, I know you.”

“I know when it’s coming and I know when it’s going — right?”

“That’s right Shakes, you’re The Man.”

 

 

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Photograph of The Great Wall of China from 1907.

Photograph of The Great Wall of China from 1907. (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

13 June 2013

I had left work and was heading for my bus stop. In his usual spot, in front of Starbucks was Craig. I handed him a Subway card. He asked, “Do you know what time it is?”

“It’s six thirty, Craig.”

“Oh, I thought it was a lot later. Thanks for the card, by the way.”

I walked further along the sidewalk and saw Bearded Bruce. He said, “I saw you coming, so I pulled out a piece of cardboard. Would you like to sit for a few minutes?”

“Sure, Bruce, I’m in no rush. It’s a beautiful evening for sitting outside.”

“I hate summer. It means I have to work three times as long for the same money.  I started at six this morning — I just get up, shower, brush my teeth and out the door. I worked three different spots today. Here it is thirteen hours later. I made forty dollars. In the winter I would have made that in three hours. Then, of course, I spent twenty-two dollars at Tim Horton’s for food, so that leaves me with eighteen, less the six-pack I bought.

“Do you know why I do this? Because I can get everything I need. In winter, if I need mitts,  someone gives me mitts. If I need a sleeping bag, someone will come along with a sleeping bag.  If I need a back pack, I’ll find a back pack. There aren’t too many days that I haven’t eaten. Now I have an apartment I don’t need to worry about sleeping outside.

“I was hoping you’d come along because I’ve got a bit of a conundrum.  Inuk and I;  we’re not so good right now. She’s in hospital. I love that woman, more than I’ve ever loved anybody in my life, I’d crawl over broken glass just to be near her, but she vexes me. The last time she was in hospital I visited her every night for three weeks. That takes a lot of time out of my day. When she got out she stayed at my place for two nights then took off. I didn’t see her for two weeks. Then one morning she appears in my spot, like nothing’s happened. I’ve always told her that if she ever heeded anything to give me a call. Well, Chuck came over yesterday. He said, ‘Inuk called. She wants you to visit her in hospital.’ I gave my word, so I have to go. I’ve just got two rules; follow them and we’ll never have any problems: don’t lie to me and don’t steal from me.

“Sure I lie to people on the street, and to the government, but to my friends I never lie, never steal. You can count on that.

“Anyway, like I said, I have this conundrum. Do I visit her or not. If I go there I’ll have to act all nice as if everything is alright between us, but it’s not. What I want to say is how pissed off I am about her disappearing like she did. She doesn’t deal well with confrontation. Me, I like to get things off my chest, then I’m done. We can be friends again. So, right now I’m just killing time, trying to decide what to do.”

Craig walked towards us. “Dennis, I hope this doesn’t offend you.” He shouted at Craig, “Have you eaten?”

I said, “I already gave him a card.”

Craig said, “Hi, I’m just going to go to Subway, then buy a few beer and head for the river. Will I see you later? I won’t be here tomorrow.”

“It’s okay, you go on your way. I’m leaving soon. Are you sure you’re going to eat?”

“Yeah, but will I see you tomorrow?”

“I don’t know, if you see me, you see me.”

Another man approached from the opposite direction. Bruce said, “Hey man. I haven’t seen you for a long time.”

“Yeah, I’ve been away. You’re looking good.”

“I’ve put on a few pounds due to good eating,  if that’s what you mean. I’ve cut back on the booze.”

“Well, this is me on drugs.”

“Are you hungry?”

“Yeah, I’m hungry.”

“Take this Subway card and get something to eat. Don’t try to sell it to get more drugs.”

“Okay Bruce, I appreciate that. I’m going to go there right now.”

The man left.  Bruce said, “I’ve known him for a long time. He’s part Inuit, part native. He’s also schizophrenic. He hears voices. He spends every cent he has smoking crack. I’ve been there, that’s how I got into dealing, but I’m off it now. I still smoke weed. I can’t understand why I can go across the street, buy a bottle of scotch, drink it and act totally obnoxious, yet if I’m caught with less than thirty grams of weed, that’s only going to make me happy, I can be fined $1000 or 6 months in jail, or both.

“I hope you don’t mind that I gave your card away, It’s just that I hate to see somebody worse off than I am…  if I can help them.”

“I understand, Bruce.”

“Now, I know that Joy prefers Subway cards to Tim Horton’s, but they’re not as good. I’ll tell you why. For two Tim Horton’s cards and eighty-six cents I can buy a can of their coffee. I’ve been doing without my coffee lately. For one card and twenty-six cents I can buy their hash browns, a sausage, egg and cheese on an English muffin, with a tall glass of milk. Besides that Subway is run by a bunch of ignorant immigrants. I can say that because I’m an immigrant.

“I went there , a few days ago, with my own card.  I’d filled it up the day before with twenty dollars.  I gave it to the guy, he put it through the machine and he said, “It shows that you only have one cent on this card.” I said, “That’s impossible, I just filled it up last night.” I wasn’t going to argue with this lout, so I went a couple of blocks to another Subway. I asked, “Can you tell me how much money is on this card?” The guy checked and said, “Twenty dollars.” Needless to say, I don’t go to the place down the street any more.

“The cards are a good idea, because it encourages people to eat, and that’s a good thing;  but they can take those same cards to Shark and he’ll give them five dollars — even trade.”

I said, “I don’t mind what people do with them. I want them have the opportunity to eat,  if they’re hungry;  but I don’t want to force anything on them.  It’s their choice.”

“So, I still have this conundrum with Inuk. I know I’m just putting it off, maybe until it’s too late to go. I’ll have another beer and think about it.

“I’ve been to twenty-three different countries, so far Canada is the one I prefer. With the charge of dealing on my record I can’t get a passport for seven years, but one day I’d like to visit Peru, because of the history, or China.

“In Canada there are far fewer fights. Where I grew up, near Glasgow, we’d go to the pub; not to drink, but to fight.  You’ve heard the Elton John song,  Saturday Night’s Alright for Fighting. That was us. I’m not afraid of anybody. I was brought up by an alcoholic dad who was six-foot four, weighed two hundred and sixty pounds. There’s nobody who could give a beating like he could.

The school yards were just as bad. There was always one group against another, Catholics against Protestants, city kids against country kids, it didn’t matter. I kept, for the most part, to myself. I hate bullies. I saw this one bully beating a smaller kid, so I stepped in. The bully went to hospital for three days. I was charged with assault and could have gone down for it, but my mom stood up for me, and the step-mom of the bully stood up for me. That was a welcome surprise. Anyway, instead of reform school, I was sent to an old folks home. I loved it there. This was the seventies. I was a pseudo hippy. The men would have all these war stories from the Second World War, the Korean War. I was reading about the Vietnam War, so we would have these intense discussions.

That was a good place for me. I still had my school work to do. I remember my auntie. If she saw I was daydreaming — I did that a lot — she’d knock me on the side of the skull with her fist. That really hurt. She’d say, “Wake up Brucie, pay attention!” When it came to write my exams I got really good marks. If I ever started daydreaming I’d think of that sharp knock on the skull.

“My mom was in a wheelchair. I was born at home with two mid-wives. I weighed thirteen pounds seven ounces and was a ‘blue baby’.

“I’m used to being around wheel chairs. There was this one guy around here who’d drive around in one of those motorized chairs. He’d bump into people, swear at them. I said to him, ‘Get out of that wheel chair and I’ll beat the shit out of you.’ I guess nobody had ever talked to him like that before. When he came back he gave me ten bucks.

I’d love to go to China. Do you know that they were writing in the third century BC. Their original alphabet was based on the tracks of birds. That was  before we’d  even defined the concept of  God that we believe, or don’t believe in  now. We were still running around, living in caves. They were building the Great Wall of China.  Hundreds of thousands, if not up to a million, workers died building the Qin wall. Every third son had to work on it for free. He still had his chores to do in the fields, but during the day he’d be shaping and placing stones for  that wall.  Do you know how long it is ? 5,500 miles. It’s one of the largest man-made structures in the world.

“Why was the Great Wall built?”

“To keep out the Manchus’  the Mongols and other warlike tribes from the north. Some Chinese guy, thinking he’d be rewarded with a high rank, led them through a secret passage way. As soon as they were on the other side of the wall they slit his throat and took over the country.”

Somebody rode by on a bicycle. Bruce yelled, “Hello Asshole!”

“Was that Chris?” I asked.

“Yeah, but ever since Weasel died I call him asshole. It’s because of something he said to me. He knew that Weasel and I were close friends. When I told him that he had died he said, ‘Good riddance! I never liked the guy anyway. I’m not going to his funeral.’

“I’d be a lot better off if I didn’t like people, or rather love them. I’ve had four close friends die this past year, five if you count Weasel’s dog Blackie. Every time it tears away a piece of my heart. Inuk nearly died during  her last time in hospital.  The infection is back.  She could die without me even seeing her. I wouldn’t want that on my conscience.”

We caught the bus together and Bruce did get off at the stop for the Civic Hospital.

 

 

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homeless family L

 

12 June 2013

The park was welcoming today. The sun was shining the weather was warm and the regulars were sitting on the curb. “Shark, ” I said, “I haven’t seen you for a long time.”

“No, I don’t come here very much any more.”

“How are you feeling?”

“I’m okay. My feet hurt — that’s because of the HIV.”

“How is Irene?”

“This morning she was puking her guts out. It’s a reaction to the new medication. She hasn’t been outside since winter;  just doesn’t have the energy. There is always an excuse, ‘It’s too hot? It’s too early. It’s too cold.’ When she does invite me out with her, it’s evening, and I’m drunk by then. I keep telling her, “Let’s do our shopping in the morning when it’s cool and the crowds aren’t as large. I have to stop by Wal-Mart for groceries on my way home. I’ll be leaving shortly.”

This is a selfmade image from the english wiki...

This is a selfmade image from the english wikipedia. The photographer has uploaded it as GFDL (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

“Joy has been staying at Chuck’s place, just around the corner from me. She wouldn’t come over to our place because of me.  Irene didn’t want to go to Chuck’s place, so they didn’t get to see each other.”

Loretta came down the sidewalk and stopped to talk.

“Loretta, ” I said, “Shark and I were just discussing how complicated women are. They always invent new rules and forget to tell us about them.”

Loretta said, “Yeah, I can’t even figure myself out.

“Shark, did you hear that I finished a two month program? I’ve been sober for over five months.

“Congratulations, Loretta! I said. “You mentioned that you’re going back to school. When does that start?”

“In another month. I have to finish my grade twelve first, then I’m going to secretarial college.”

“Buck has quit smoking. He’s got two patches and a puffer. It’s been four days now.”

“Yeah,” said Shark, “I saw him this morning to buy some smokes. He told me all about it. He’s been sober four years, hasn’t he?”

“Five.”

“Good for him, ” said Shark. “I should quit smoking. It would save me a lot of money. Mind you, I’ve been saving money not buying diapers. I get a two hundred-dollar allowance for those. This morning, at Buck’s place I let a wet fart, I said, ‘Oh, oh, I better go home.'”

Loretta said, “Nothing a shower and a change of clothes can’t fix.

“I had his dog Dillinger all day yesterday. He loves to chase a ball.”

Shark said, “He can play with it all by himself. He bats it with his paw, then runs after it.

“What’s happening with that asshole you went out with?”

“He’s in detention now.”

“Has he been bothering you lately?”

“Not since they put the restraining order against him.” To me she said, “This all has to do with to when I was raped.  It’ll be a year ago July seventh.  I went to the hospital immediately after, so they have evidence and were able to charge him. There’s been a preliminary hearing. The official court date has been set for September.

“This is the first time I’ve been able to charge a guy with rape. At home it used to happen all the time.

“See what I made?” Loretta showed me a lighter that had a red, beaded cover. “A guy in the recovery program showed me how to do it. It’s made with seaweed beads and clear fishing line. I want to try to make cell phone covers.”

Wolf said, “Dennis, I read that horse book you gave me. I didn’t think I’d like it. I don’t know anything about horses. I always thought it was a sport for rich people;  but I didn’t have anything else, it was on the top shelf,  so I started reading. I really dove into it. I couldn’t put it down.  I had to find out who was killing the horses. Have you read the book?

“No, I haven’t read it.”

“Then you won’t mind me telling you that the vet was behind it. He was poisoning them. I wouldn’t give the book a first rank, but it was still good. I prefer the shoot-em-up detective kind.

“I’ve been sober for the past five days. Because of the rain, I didn’t feel like going out;  but after a while — even with the books — Shaggy and I get bored, so we come down here.  I don’t like everybody here. I told Jacques to fuck off the other day.

“Jacques, I’m sorry about the other day. Are we okay?”

Shamus  and Brent from the Innercity Ministries stopped by. “Would anybody like a sandwich?”

Shark said, “Yeah, I’ll take one. Do you have any razors? How about Chapstick, or lip gloss, or something like that. Irene wants me to get her some.”

Shamus said to Shakes, “How have you been?”

“I’ve been trapped in my apartment. I didn’t want to leave with the door unlocked,  so I had to stay there for two days.  I haven’t paid my cable bill, so I didn’t have television. I haven’t paid my phone bill so I didn’t have a phone. I had nothing.”

I asked,  “Did Sammy have your keys?”

“Yeah, Sammy had them. Yesterday he came back and apologized. He said, ‘I forgot I had your keys. I brought you a bottle.'”

I asked, “So, everything is good now?”

“Yeah, everything is good.”

 

 

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